Tom Sewell

Vladia doesn't want to change forms, but if she can do it to save a life?

I'd like to see Akiko's dad. It might solve the mystery of why he has such a strong-minded wife. The "bloodlines" Noriko mentioned to Adrian could mean either Dad's a wizard, or that Dad is a muggle which may be a source of some of the rift between Mom and her sister.

Send for the the ASBs! (Alien Space Bats) Of course, maybe there are ASBs in the Moperverse, given that uryuom have been living on Earth for a long time. Maybe they are the ASBs of the Moperverse, smoothing things out so they can live in harmony with their new neighbors. After all, there's Lavender, and there was the uryuom trooper in Painted Black. And of course, Minion, The Shive's victim assistant.

To do that much covering up would have really needed magic, and magic wasn't usable for a long time after The Change. The weirdness of the Moperverse is limited by the premise that it's not vastly different from our world. It can maybe go as far as Men in Black territory, but not into full X-Files/Cthulhu. Or at least so far. There's also the fact that witches were being hanged or burned in America and Europe until about 300 years ago, and how can you believe in witches if you don't believe in magic? If there was a huge effort to make people believe magic wasn't real, it wasn't working very well, was it?

Well, nothing like that battle Pandora sort of remembered from her previous life has occurred in recorded history. Maybe you could shoehorn it into the Aryan invasions of the Indus civilization that the Vedas are supposed to chronicle, but there are doubts now that that invasion really happened, at least as depicted in the Vedas. But with a whole other side of Earth to work with, with dragons and griffins, and werewolves all over the place until Pandora wiped them out, The Shive really doesn't need to fit that into the recorded history of our side of Earth. And how many wizards, seers, and people with magical affinities are there? Let's see: The Circle of Eight all have at least one spell now. Grace probably doesn't count because, uryuom. Other teenage magic users now include Noah, Rhoda, Catalina, Kitty, and Good Tom. That's a dozen so far. Then there's the adults: Edward, Wolf, Cranium, and Arthur Arthur, and maybe Greg. Tweens (probably) Luke and Dex. Now we're up to twenty. Moperville is usually supposed to be based on Naperville, which has a population of around 150,000 now. That works out to a ratio of one magic user to to every 7500 people. By a happy coincidence, the current world population is estimated to be about 7.5 billion, so if the Talented are spread evenly, that works out to 20 million. At the simple doubling-every-generation rate, that works out to something like 21 generations or 420 years. We're talking the era of the Three Musketeers, the Thirty Years War, the establishment of the Tokugawa Shogunate in Japan, and the Pilgrims landing at Plymouth Rock. But that doesn't fit the clothing and the lack of firearms shown back when Adrian's father was alive. After all, to have musketeers one must have muskets. All these problems vanish if it's on the Other Side. Maybe Pandora brought her son to this side to be safer?

Mathematically, possible. Since everyone has two parents (whether or not they can be located), everyone has four grandparents, right? Well, what if your mother or father married a first cousin? Then you'd have only three grandparents. In not that many generations, it can get hard to marry someone who isn't a cousin. And if you're royalty, you might be required to marry your cousin. If you're Egyptian or Polynesian royalty, you might be required to marry your sibling. The famous Cleopatra was married to two different brothers. Still, with double the number of parent slots for each generation going back, in ten generations you could have more than a thousand different ancestors. In twenty, more than a million. In thirty, over a billion. Figuring one generation per twenty years, you could have a billion ancestors who lived six hundred years ago. Since there weren't a billion people on the planet until around a century ago, quite a number of branches have to have intertwined. If you'd like to explore the math further, google up Joseph T. Chang and you can find a paper he wrote up in 1999; it's a 25-page PDF. Moving on from that scary "math" part, proving someone is really descended from Genghis Khan or anyone else who lived that far back isn't a slam dunk. We don't have any DNA samples from Genghis. He was buried in a secret place and everyone who did the job was executed. There are a lot of people who claim to be his descendents, but they all have incentives to lie about that, or at least keep any doubts to themselves. G.K. is supposed to have fathered 36 sons who fathered children, and there were daughters who've gone unrecorded. The Big K had many wives and many concubines, and who in their right mind would complain if he screwed any slave girl or captive he fancied. So it's a fair guess that he has many living descendants. Pandora's last reset was centuries ago, and we don't have any info on children she might have had besides Adrian. So it is feasible that every human with special magical gifts is descended from her.

Clothing?

Panel 2, a bit of right buttock and hip.

We could, of course, missed any amount of dialogue between the penultimate and last panels. For instance, right after Pandora uncrosses her legs: Heka: Oh, I see you go commando too. Pandora: WHAT?! Pandora is showing an awful lot of leg, and actually some not-leg.

The secret word is "you." Which is why Heka can say Pandora is the "perfect example of why". Is that not worthy of an over-the-pole "WHAT?!"

Speaking of ambiguities, think about what Noriko said about Tedd's ancestry and what Adrian said to her about Tedd--and that neither one mentioned Edward at all. The alternative paternity of Tedd would be a good thing to conceal from him for more than one reason. Besides Grace's reflection looking like in Death Sentence, there's also Susan seeing the woman she caught her father cheating with in the mirror in the comic actually titled The Other Woman With Susan's Face. Maybe there's more than co-incidence that strange reflections in mirrors were featured in both comics. Or maybe we have one or two red herrings. ---- Scotty called me on this one. I wrote the original just before taking a nap, trusting my "infallible" memory. Which, come to think of it, could explain away Susan seeing the woman he caught cheating with her mom looking like herself. Memory doesn't need magic to get things wrong. But there's also the probably-fainter possibility that Noriko thinks Edward is Tedd's father because Noriko believes that Adrian can't be because "Elves can't have children." It's also possible know-it-all Edward knows that's disinformation, and knows to whom Heka's missing word applies.

This is the loudest one yet. The uryuom holding his hands over his ears has the entire Earth between himself and Egypt, which is, of course, on the other side of the planet from the Americas. All the previous shouts were from Moperville, near Chicago. Apparently the "WHAT?!" had to come over the North Pole like a Russian ICBM. Or maybe Santa. How many of you remember actual announcements on TV and radio on Christmas Eve that NORAD was tracking Santa?

Voltaire told Abner his plan would make this world a better place. While there are all sorts of evil ways to interpret that, one that would fit is a world with less vampires and certainly one without Sirleck. This could win him Brownie points with the "they" who are supposed to finally listen to him. As for why Adrian would be at the Mall, why not? Looking for a new cat toy for Max? Giving Noah a ride because letting Noah fly there would be a bad idea? Cinnabon? Something to note: The only time the entire Circle of Eight have been together all at once was Grace's Birthday Party. Susan hasn't fought in any of the big battles. Her contribution against the Goo was calling Nanase in and summoning her sword, which she never used. She didn't figure in Painted Black at all, or fight against Abraham or against the bloodgrem Abraham summoned into her school. Susan didn't fight not-Tengu, and made no appearance at all in So a Date at the Mall except in a flashback.

Regarding Voltaire, remember what Pandora told the Emissary: What gets an Immortal reset is doing something that they think breaks Immortal law. Can we say "gigantic loophole?" Sure we can. One similarity between Voltaire and General Shade Tail is that they both see mortals as at best pets--inferior beings. There's an awful lot of proof of what real mortals can do when they believe they are superior beings, or striving for a superior cause. Moving on to speculations that aren't as disturbing, what seems to be approaching is some kind of big battle at the mall erupting during Friday's get-together between Susan and Diane. Keeping in mind what Arthur Arthur said in his last appearance, I wonder if he's actually in cahoots with Voltaire, or at least being manipulated by our least-favorite Immortal. Why the Mall? Well, for one thing, The Shive has already used it twice, recently, so he might be able to re-use some backgrounds. For another, it's a place where there would be many eyewitnesses. For a third, the Mall can provide plausible excuses for anyone to be there even if they aren't spying on Susan and/or Diane. For a fourth, Plan CM depends on a bunch of vampires, so our vampire hunters don't have to commute to the battle. Speaking of Lord Tedd, could it be that he's trying to eliminate the other Tedds to keep them from bringing about whatever disaster he brought upon his own world?

The Bible has a lot of stuff that seems to put women down beginning with Eve, but at least Eve gets created as a companion for Adam. In the ancient Greek religion, Pandora, the first woman, is created by the gods to punish men! And you must admit, our Pandora is pretty much into punishing those she believes deserve such.

Speaking of uryuom limitations on using human magic... Just how did Gillian get that hammer? Well, technically the old hammers weren't human magic, they were created by an artifact Jerry 1.0 created. Susan's new hammer spell doesn't even work the same way (she can hammer anyone) and it's exclusive to her.

The way I read uryuom family life is that uryuoms who've been living on Earth for generations (which I believe is canon) have taken on sex roles more or less to fit in with human cultures. Or at least some of them, like William and Gillian. It is canon that uryuoms often and perhaps even usually have more than two genetic parents. What hasn't been established is how much connection uryuoms put between creating a child and raising it. We're not even sure that the egg William and Gillian have been carting around will have any of William's or Gillian's genes. They could be shopping around for contributions from friends or from people who have traits they'd like their kid to have. And since they very much want to fit into human society as smoothly as possible, some human genes for their kid sounds good to me. Getting back to Noah, if he is a construct--and arguably all uryuoms are themselves constructs--his "mother" doesn't even have to be female. The possibility that Susan's mother really isn't her biological mother has been around for a long time, and it's not completely ruled out yet. So how about the possibility that the man Noah believes was his father really wasn't, biologically speaking?

Note that The Shive didn't make that Q&A until twenty-five months after his commentary hints about Noah. Of course, it's also canon that Noah has had a lot of training, and he's been trained by Adrian. And if Noah is a genetic construct like Grace and her siblings, he could have been designed to be free of the usual restrictions on human-flavored magic by crossbreeds. So The Shive has at least a couple of ways to retcon His way out of the apparent contradiction between His 2014 Noah comment and His 2016 Q&A about Grace learning spells, should He care to. Even the Grace Q&A doesn't say it's impossible for a part-uryuom crossbreed to learn spells, just extremely hard. Perhaps so hard one might consider selling one's soul to get around the restrictions?

I stand corrected. I didn't start reading EGS until the middle of So a Date at the Mall and going back through them to catch up I didn't always read Dan's commentaries. That said, no General Shade Tail in our Tedd's universe kind of supports my Big Deal hypothesis further, don't it? Speaking of Noah, why would he and Grace have similar auras? And prehensile tentacles? The obvious answer is they are both part-uryuom. Since Noah's father was one of the mad scientists who created Damien, that's pretty easy to justify. But does Noah know this? Noah's been going to the same school as Grace for nearly a year and we know they had the same gym class for at least one semester.

I stand corrected. I didn't start reading EGS until the middle of So a Date at the Mall and going back through them to catch up I didn't always read Dan's commentaries. That said, no General Shade Tail in our Tedd's universe kind of supports my Big Deal hypothesis further, don't it? Speaking of Noah, why would he and Grace have similar auras? And prehensile tentacles? The obvious answer is they are both part-uryuom. Since Noah's father was one of the mad scientists who created Damien, that's pretty easy to justify. But does Noah know this? Noah's been going to the same school as Grace for nearly a year and we know they had the same gym class for at least one semester.

Here's a question I don't think anyone else has asked yet: Do Immortals like Pandora, Voltaire, Helena, Demetrius, and Jerry travel between universes, or are they restricted to one? Or something in between, such as their powers only working in their home universe, or their powers working differently in other universes? The only characters in EGS we've actually seen travel between universes are Nioi and Magus--and Magus may not count because he's stuck in the spirit plane. Beta Tedd was just able to send a message to Grace, and Lord Tedd sent a very small construct to our Tedd's universe. I'm not counting the Griffins because Lady Andrea says she just comes from the other side of the same world. There's a hint in Squirrel Prophet that one of Luke's friends knows about General Shade Tail, but that's all; we haven't even seen the character at the other end of that phone call. Ellen is somehow sure that "someday" she'll meet the other Ellen she shares memories with, or at least she was way back at Grace's birthday party. So crossing between universes seems to be a very big deal in EGS, maybe even for Immortals. Maybe Voltaire is the only Immortal who can do it.

With their next meeting set up the next month, I kind of think whatever Sirleck and Magus have set up is going to happen first. Whatever it is, I'm predicting it will take two or three months of our time to resolve at the least. Lady Andrea knows a lot about magic. I'd put her at least at the level of Tedd's dad. So she might actually know both purposes of a Seer, or be able to guess what the second purpose is. A possible future conversation: Tedd: Is there anything else you can tell me? Andrea: I have a theory. Tedd: What is it? Andrea: If my theory is right, I shouldn't tell you. Gee, I'm making Andrea sound a bit like Tedd's dad, aren't I? I don't think Tedd's dad knows, but if he does, he's awfully good at keeping his mouth shut. Perhaps so good it ruined his marriage.

This gives us at least until Monday to come up with crackpot plot theories about Tedd's first purpose and his unknown ability, and probably much longer to speculate about his ultra-secret hush-hush tell-no-one second purpose. Goodie! Speaking of crackpot theories, if Heka really dates back to Ancient Egypt, he might not be as smart as Pandora. Why? Well, he's already said that he's a different kind of immortal than the "fairies" who are now calling themselves the Immortals, and as a maybe-god of information (I hesitate to say "wisdom"; that, I believe, was Thoth's department), he wouldn't have been terribly effective if he had to reset every couple of centuries and re-learn his job. But getting so smart and so bored he goes crazy every few centuries isn't acceptable either. So I'm saying that he's probably more stable but slower-to-learn and, of course, able to find his own entertainment. On the other hand, Heka stated he "holds the mantle of Heka" which implies that others have held it before. Which brings me to my second crackpot theory: Heka actually is the "Will of Magic." Quite awhile ago I posited that the Will might actually be an office. But on to my third crackpot theory: The second purpose is for the best of the seers to become the new Heka or "Will of Magic." And my fourth: Voltaire doesn't want Tedd to become the new Heka because Heka has dominion not just over human mortal magic, but all magic, including that of fairies/Immortals. Tedd-Heka could ruin a whole lot of Voltaire's fun. Or maybe even make the pain-in-the-ass immortal into a mortal.

Maybe not. Egypt was really ruled by Britain for the better part of a century, and I'm old enough to remember when they tried to take it back in 1956.

Ah, yes, striped tractor-feed paper. I was struggling with it long before most of you were born, mostly the wide version which had 132 characters per line as I remember (the home versions were usually 80-characters which could produce 8 1/2 by 11 sheets once you carefully separated them and tore off the feed strips.) The Navy must have leveled many a forest to create the mountain of printer rolls. Once printed, you had to wrestle them into special binders because, of course, you never throw away records. I don't think I ever saw a single officer actually reading one.