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Scotty

Story, Monday August 21, 2017

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Today's strip reminds me of a Darwin Awards tale...

The following mind-boggling attempt at a crime spree appeared to be the robber's first, due to his lack of a previous record of violence, and his terminally stupid choices:

1. His target was H&J Leather & Firearms. A gun shop.

2. The shop was full of customers - firearms customers.

3. To enter the shop, the robber had to step around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door.

4. A uniformed officer was standing at the counter, having coffee before work.

Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a holdup, and fired a few wild shots. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, covered by several customers who also drew their guns, thereby removing the confused criminal from the gene pool.

No one else was hurt.

From this it may be inferred that if you have to rob a gun store, you had better be the Terminator.

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1 hour ago, Scotty said:

http://www.egscomics.com/index.php?id=2388

That is one weird looking vampire/aberration.

I'm a little torn, of course Comically Evil Guy's about to get eaten which would essentially save the orphanage, but this is an aberration we're talking about.

I don't mind when evil people kill other evil people. One evil person is dead, and we can put the other evil person behind bars for murder. Win win, though with aberrations, it tends to be kill or run on sight, so that imprisoning thing probably isn't viable.

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9 hours ago, Scotty said:

http://www.egscomics.com/index.php?id=2388

That is one weird looking vampire/aberration.

I'm a little torn, of course Comically Evil Guy's about to get eaten which would essentially save the orphanage, but this is an aberration we're talking about.

Maybe he can get the molotov lit before he dies and mutually destroy the vampire? I doubt it, as the vampire looks like it might be a neat minor(in relative terms) enemy for the main cast to fight, but it's not entirely out of the question that CEG could get somewhat lucky in taking the literal monster down with him.

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In the comic, Dan said:

So yes, this is the first, and last, appearance of comically evil guy.

WHAT? So we won't see what happened to him? Seriously, there should be at least one more frame with him. Or at least some parts of him.

17 hours ago, partner555 said:

I don't mind when evil people kill other evil people. One evil person is dead, and we can put the other evil person behind bars for murder. Win win, though with aberrations, it tends to be kill or run on sight, so that imprisoning thing probably isn't viable.

9 hours ago, Drasvin said:

Maybe he can get the molotov lit before he dies and mutually destroy the vampire? I doubt it, as the vampire looks like it might be a neat minor(in relative terms) enemy for the main cast to fight, but it's not entirely out of the question that CEG could get somewhat lucky in taking the literal monster down with him.

While I don't think this "evil" guy will be good OR lucky enough to destroy the vampire, in general, evil guys killing other evil guys is the preferred outcome. Especially if the good guys have problems with killing.

 

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Dan told us in his comment that this will be the only appearance of Comically Evil Guy. But maybe he'll change his mind. At least for part(s) of him. Or maybe the next puppy Good Tom rescues will prompt this dialog:

There you go, you're safe now. But boy do you stink. What have you been rolling around in, monster poop?

My Molotov cocktail idea was really just an excuse to get in a smoking boot. Someone actually made 25mm figures for Paranoia, and one of them was the signature smoking boot. It represents the highest damage category on the personal combat table: Vaporized.

Stay alert! Trust no one! Keep your laser handy!

You may have guessed by now that Paranoia is a satirical game in the great tradition of others of that ilk such as The Awful Green Things From Space, Munchkins, Communist Invaders From Mars, Teenagers from Outer Space, S.P.A.N.C. (Space Pirate Amazon Ninja Catgirls), etc.

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If you ever need to make a Molotov cocktail, it's safer not to post the information on a public forum and make it look like a how-to in anarchistic bombing attacks. The other forumgoers and the moderators might not appreciate it.

-- edited by the Moderator

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