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The Old Hack

Story Wednesday Addams October 25, 2017

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Have all of you forgotten that Buffy the Vampire Slayer was a cheerleader?

I'd really like to see Diane's reaction to learning Susan's last name is "Pompoms" but that would mean that Diane would have to reveal her own last name and we can't have that, can we?

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Susan's reaction to Diane's cheerleading is hilarious.

Dan's not showing it, but Susan has to be imagining herself with blonde hair and in a cheerleading outfit doing an exercise routine in Panel Two. Or at least, imagining Diane doing it near people Susan knows, with them mistaking Diane for Susan.

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45 minutes ago, Darkxemjas said:

Susan's reaction to Diane's cheerleading is hilarious.

Dan's not showing it, but Susan has to be imagining herself with blonde hair and in a cheerleading outfit doing an exercise routine in Panel Two. Or at least, imagining Diane doing it near people Susan knows, with them mistaking Diane for Susan.

Dan showed us long ago that Susan wanted to avoid being seen as a cheerleader type because of the fact that it was a young blonde cheerleader type that she caught her dad having an affair with. I think we'll be getting to that soon though, but hopefully Diane learned from the last time she judged someone for not dating and won't make that mistake again.

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I kind of think Diane is going to pursue the circumstances of Susan's kissing a girl in our next episode. Maybe Susan will summon the demonic duck? Which would be very appropriate because, after all, the duck was right there.'

That leads to another question: What happens when a demonic duck walks into a bar?

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2 minutes ago, Tom Sewell said:

That leads to another question: What happens when a demonic duck walks into a bar?

A demonic duck walks into a bar. You would think it had seen it coming.

A demonic duck walks into a bar. This is what happens when you set the bar too low.

A demonic duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender to serve a drink for its dog. The bartender gives the dog a tuft of fur from the dogfight it was in the day before.

A demonic duck walks into a bar. The bartender takes one look and immediately starts to drink his entire inventory.

A demonic duck tries to walk into a bar but gets stopped by the bartender. Says the bartender, "I've heard it before."

And so on, and so on, ad nauseam, ad infinitum.

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A demonic duck walks into a bar. The bar became empty.

The penultimate evidence for me is if we see Susan with Diane's hairstyle.

Then again, she sure looks like a tosser type, which still involves contact.

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15 hours ago, The Old Hack said:

ETA: If Diane has done cheerleading, she most likely also has potential in a fight. Cheerleaders are often pretty goldarn strong.

She probably wasn't doing it on professional level, but yes her cheerleading experience might be closest to being fight ready she has.

13 hours ago, Tom Sewell said:

Have all of you forgotten that Buffy the Vampire Slayer was a cheerleader?

I tried.

I would point out other cheerleaders that that reminded me but seems they disappeared from web to dead-tree and paid areas.

9 hours ago, Tom Sewell said:

I kind of think Diane is going to pursue the circumstances of Susan's kissing a girl in our next episode. Maybe Susan will summon the demonic duck? Which would be very appropriate because, after all, the duck was right there.'

But noone NOTICED it was there.

10 hours ago, Scotty said:
11 hours ago, Darkxemjas said:

Dan's not showing it, but Susan has to be imagining herself with blonde hair and in a cheerleading outfit doing an exercise routine in Panel Two. Or at least, imagining Diane doing it near people Susan knows, with them mistaking Diane for Susan.

Dan showed us long ago that Susan wanted to avoid being seen as a cheerleader type because of the fact that it was a young blonde cheerleader type that she caught her dad having an affair with. I think we'll be getting to that soon though, but hopefully Diane learned from the last time she judged someone for not dating and won't make that mistake again.

While that might be part of it, I don't think Susan would be cheerleader even if she would caught her father with some sexy librarian type.

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14 hours ago, hkmaly said:

While that might be part of it, I don't think Susan would be cheerleader even if she would caught her father with some sexy librarian type.

I think the physical contact issues and such stemmed from catching her dad with another woman so it's likely it wouldn't matter who she caught him with, though if the woman was a dark haired or redhead, she might not have dyed her hair.

My line of thought was that if her dad didn't cheat, or if Susan never caught him, she might have grown up much less cynical about things and even might have considered cheerleading or something.

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Doesn't mean it isn't appropriate. Besides, Susan hasn't summoned the duck yet.

 

2 hours ago, Scotty said:

My line of thought was that if her dad didn't cheat, or if Susan never caught him, she might have grown up much less cynical about things and even might have considered cheerleading or something

I sort of agree, but her dad was caught hugging an almost naked young blonde in the only home Susan has ever known. If he did it once and got away with it, what are the chances he wouldn't do something like that again?

Whether or not Susan's dad was her "real" dad doesn't really matter; he was the father Susan loved unconditionally until the moment she caught him cheating on her mom (doesn't matter if Mrs. Pompoms is her "real" mom, either). He didn't just score a penalty, he's been banned from the game, even if Susan does still feel for him. And if Adrian Raven does turn out to be Susan's biological father, Susan's going to be at least as angry with him as Dad #1 unless Adrian does some powerful good 'splainin'. The most acceptable explanation if in that case is that Adrian, believing he couldn't father children (or mother them if he can change his gender), has made occasional whoopee with various willing partners over the centuries, and that Susan and/or Diane are the result of a brief liaison 19 years ago after which the mother decided to put the result(s) up for adoption and not to tell Adrian. And if he blonde was Susan's real mother, her plan might have been just to wait until she was sure Cheating Dad was asleep to go up and look at her child sleeping before leaving.

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2 hours ago, Tom Sewell said:

Doesn't mean it isn't appropriate. Besides, Susan hasn't summoned the duck yet.

 

I sort of agree, but her dad was caught hugging an almost naked young blonde in the only home Susan has ever known. If he did it once and got away with it, what are the chances he wouldn't do something like that again?

Whether or not Susan's dad was her "real" dad doesn't really matter; he was the father Susan loved unconditionally until the moment she caught him cheating on her mom (doesn't matter if Mrs. Pompoms is her "real" mom, either). He didn't just score a penalty, he's been banned from the game, even if Susan does still feel for him. And if Adrian Raven does turn out to be Susan's biological father, Susan's going to be at least as angry with him as Dad #1 unless Adrian does some powerful good 'splainin'. The most acceptable explanation if in that case is that Adrian, believing he couldn't father children (or mother them if he can change his gender), has made occasional whoopee with various willing partners over the centuries, and that Susan and/or Diane are the result of a brief liaison 19 years ago after which the mother decided to put the result(s) up for adoption and not to tell Adrian. And if he blonde was Susan's real mother, her plan might have been just to wait until she was sure Cheating Dad was asleep to go up and look at her child sleeping before leaving.

When that happened Diane wasn't old enough to really understand what it meant. All she really knows about it is probably what her mother has told her as she grew up, and that the big blow up happened after she saw her father with the blonde woman. I don't think she stopped loving him that day, but that it was something that grew as she started to understand what had happened that day. What we don't know is her fathers version of the story. I'm not saying her mother has twisted the truth, just that it's often hard to find out what happened to cause a break up if all you have to go on is what one of them says.

Even if there's no malicious intent a parent can screw their kid up real easy by omitting to mention details that is either slightly embarrassing or something they think might be confusing for their child.

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8 hours ago, Scotty said:
23 hours ago, hkmaly said:

While that might be part of it, I don't think Susan would be cheerleader even if she would caught her father with some sexy librarian type.

I think the physical contact issues and such stemmed from catching her dad with another woman so it's likely it wouldn't matter who she caught him with, though if the woman was a dark haired or redhead, she might not have dyed her hair.

Yes.

8 hours ago, Scotty said:

My line of thought was that if her dad didn't cheat, or if Susan never caught him, she might have grown up much less cynical about things and even might have considered cheerleading or something.

While being cynical is part of why she don't try cheerleading, bigger part likely is that cheerleaders are assumed to be airheads. Susan is proud nerd and that's unlikely to be connected to catching her father.

(To clarify, the reason why she's not cheerleader, in the order of importance, is catching her father with cheerleader type, being proud nerd and being cynical ; also note that she was probably considerably less cynical before the vampire attack).

5 hours ago, Tom Sewell said:

And if he blonde was Susan's real mother, her plan might have been just to wait until she was sure Cheating Dad was asleep to go up and look at her child sleeping before leaving.

While there is some logic in sleeping with father of your child to see it, even if he's adoptive father, I don't think it would be the first path any women would take.

3 hours ago, Cpt. Obvious said:

When that happened Diane wasn't old enough to really understand what it meant.

Maybe not "really understand", but her face when she saw the woman suggest she already got some idea about other women not supposed to be in their home in night with her dad. Either it was already mentioned - not necessary in context of full infidelity, maybe the father was just talking too much with some waitress and her mom voiced disapproval - or she read/saw something more on topic than sleeping beauty even at that age.

Obviously, her father insisting she must not tell mother really driven the point home, but she dropped her book before that.

3 hours ago, Cpt. Obvious said:

What we don't know is her fathers version of the story. I'm not saying her mother has twisted the truth, just that it's often hard to find out what happened to cause a break up if all you have to go on is what one of them says.

There can't really be any good explanation for this. Of course, if the relationship actually broke before that, it's less bad, but still bad. And if her mother would be cheating first, I think it would come up in divorce.

 

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2 hours ago, hkmaly said:

While there is some logic in sleeping with father of your child to see it, even if he's adoptive father, I don't think it would be the first path any women would take.

5 hours ago, Cpt. Obvious said:

But was there really a better path to take? Just showing up without warning is pretty much stalking. The one best opportunity to see Susan/Tiffany without getting tagged as a stalker and without being seen by her daughter would be this one. It's not a perfect plan, but it's less imperfect than any other given the parameters. The way the woman looked in speechless horror at Susan/Tiffany catching her with Cheating Dad really fits in with the plan-gone-horribly-wrong trope.

A variation would make Cheating Dad much worse. What if he knew the woman was Susan's birth mother and tried to extort sex from her for that brief look?

I wonder if there's more backstory to why Edward called Cheating Dad a "cheating cheater who cheated." Sounds like Edward has a personal investment here. Does he actually know Susan's mother? Maybe professionally? We already pretty much know Mama Kitsune is a Q-wizard. I'm coining the term with a nod to the Q-ship, a nondescript merchant ship in appearance, but bristling with hidden weapons.

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35 minutes ago, Tom Sewell said:

But was there really a better path to take? Just showing up without warning is pretty much stalking.

For start, she might TELL she's her biological mother. Maybe not to Susan but to her parents. (Which actually ties into your "worse variation"). She may try to do some babysitting or maybe help in preschool. Or, well, she can try the stalking. If she's not too creepy she can get away with it (would be harder for men).

35 minutes ago, Tom Sewell said:

I wonder if there's more backstory to why Edward called Cheating Dad a "cheating cheater who cheated." Sounds like Edward has a personal investment here.

His personal investment might be unrelated to the cheating dad specifically and be just about cheating in general. We don't know how the divorce with Noriko went ...

Or, he might've said it because details about the divorce included something about how much he cheated - maybe it wasn't just once or twice ...

35 minutes ago, Tom Sewell said:

Does he actually know Susan's mother? Maybe professionally?

He's not so old to know her since then, and appear to actually only find out about that when doing background check on Susan.

35 minutes ago, Tom Sewell said:

We already pretty much know Mama Kitsune is a Q-wizard. I'm coining the term with a nod to the Q-ship, a nondescript merchant ship in appearance, but bristling with hidden weapons.

You think she's from Queenstown? :)

Also, technically we don't know she's wizard. We know she has magical talent. While personally I suppose she's awakened wizard, neither was confirmed in comics yet.

 

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5 hours ago, hkmaly said:

While being cynical is part of why she don't try cheerleading, bigger part likely is that cheerleaders are assumed to be airheads. Susan is proud nerd and that's unlikely to be connected to catching her father.

Diane's a closet nerd though.

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1 hour ago, Scotty said:
7 hours ago, hkmaly said:

While being cynical is part of why she don't try cheerleading, bigger part likely is that cheerleaders are assumed to be airheads. Susan is proud nerd and that's unlikely to be connected to catching her father.

Diane's a closet nerd though.

Which is extremely good reason to do cheerleading :)

It's not like cheerleading would MAKE you stupid. (Unlike the football itself.)

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12 hours ago, Tom Sewell said:

Michael Palin was not available. Nudge, nudge, know what I mean?

It was surely a given, ya wicked ay.

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