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Illjwamh

This Day In History

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15 hours ago, The Old Hack said:

such things as big showy churches that are potentially perfect shelters but will not accommodate flood refugees

By their fruits ye may know them, eh?

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On ‎8‎/‎29‎/‎2018 at 2:37 AM, CritterKeeper said:

...they were told evacuation centers wouldn't allow them to bring their beloved pets and they couldn't bear to leave them to die, and again, either couldn't afford to get anywhere that would allow them to bring their pets, or couldn't get out fast enough with them (evacuation planning now takes pets into account for this very reason). 

This reminds me.  Last year when my neighborhood was evacuated for Darth Irma, I went to a Middle School about ten miles from my home.  The school was not designated a "Pet Friendly" shelter, but a lot of people brought their pets anyway.   A few small classrooms wound up stacked to the ceiling with portable kennels and pet carriers.

Was it right or wrong to put these pets into those cramped conditions?

Aside from the pet problem, and the fact that the shelter did not provide cots as you often see on TV, the school wound up being a well run shelter.  I have only complements for the Red Cross, the Manatee School District, The Manatee Sheriff's Department, The National Guard, FEMA, and the Volunteers, mostly organized by the Red Cross and the School.  

Edited by Pharaoh RutinTutin
Spelling

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2 hours ago, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

This reminds me.  Last year when my neighborhood was evacuated for Darth Irma, I went to a Middle School about ten miles from my home.  The school was not designated a "Pet Friendly" shelter, but a lot of people brought their pets anyway.   A few small classrooms wound up stacked to the ceiling with portable kennels and pet carriers.

Was it right or wrong to put these pets into those cramped conditions?

Depends on what the alternatives are.  If one is the pet drowning, possible after swimming to exhaustion or fighting desperately to escape a cage or locked door as the water rises inexhorably....and the other is their owner risking both their lives trying to stay to help them or trying to get to shelter that will allow them....then a temporary stay in uncomfortable circumstances is not such a bad choice.

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On August 30 in History:

526 - King Theoderic the Great of the Ostrogoths dies of dysentery. He should have stopped to rest and increased rations.

1590 - Tokugawa Ieyasu takes up residence in a little place called Edo Castle. He'll probably just hang there for a bit before moving to somewhere a little more impressive.

1797 - Mary Shelley is born. I have no proof that the midwife who delivered her screamed, "It's alive! It's ALIVE!", but I'm going to keep pretending she did.

1918 - The attempted assassination of Bolshevik leader Vladimir Lenin prompts the party to institute the Red Terror, resulting in the deaths of perhaps hundreds of thousands of people. No kill like overkill.

1945 - Emperor Bảo Đại abdicates, allowing Vietnam to become a republic. The region will enjoy peace and prosperity for decades to come.

1963 - The direct hotline between leaders in Washington DC and Moscow is installed. They got the idea from Batman.

1967 - Thurgood Marshall becomes the first African-American U.S. Supreme Court Justice. White SCOTUS fans immediately decry this as pandering, and complain that they aren't represented anymore.

1991 - Azerbaijan jumps on the bandwagon and out of the USSR. American diplomats scramble to find out where the hell Azerbaijan is.

2015 - Wes Craven dies in his home surrounded by loved ones. Worst twist ending ever.

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31 August

AD 12 – Birth of Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus.  Son of General Germanicus and Maternal Grandson of Octavius Augustus.  Also known as, Caligula.  He is such a sweet and innocent little boy.

1888 – Mary Ann Nichols is murdered. She is the first of Jack the Ripper's confirmed victims.  This is why you need to fill out the proper forms.  Mr The Ripper may have had any number of other victims.  But because he didn't update his blog with the identities of the targets and details of their demise, today we really don't know Jack.

1895 – German Count Ferdinand von Zeppelin patents his navigable balloon.  And no, he was not working for Goodyear.

1879 – Birth of Alma Maria Mahler Gropius Werfel (born Alma Margaretha Maria Schindler), Austrian-American composer and author.  So much could be said, but Tom Lehrer put it best when he was discussing her 1964 obituary.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8QEsdfX-Lek

1897 – Thomas Edison patents the Kinetoscope, an early movie viewer.  Is sitting in a dirty chair on a sticky floor in a crowded, noisy, and freezing theatre really such an improvement over one person at a time watching a silent film?

1907 – Russia and the United Kingdom sign the Anglo-Russian Convention, by which the UK recognizes Russian preeminence in northern Persia, while Russia recognizes British preeminence in southeastern Persia and Afghanistan. Both powers pledge not to interfere in Tibet.  The Russians and the British are in agreement about Persia?  Shouldn't the Persians have some say in this matter?  Or is being partitioned by 20th Century Empires some sort of karmic justice on the distant descendants of the Ancient Persian Empire?

1920 – The first radio news program is broadcast by 8MK, now WWJ, in Detroit.  Media manipulation of the "news" had only been able to reach those who could both read and buy a newspaper regularly.  Now the target audience is expanded to those who only need to listen and buy a radio once.

1935 – In an attempt to stay out of the growing tensions concerning Germany and Japan, the United States passes the first of its Neutrality Acts.  US President Franklin Roosevelt does not veto the legislation, but spends a lot of time figuring ways around the details.

1939 – The Gleiwitz radio station in Nazi Germany, near the border of Poland, is viciously attacked.  Some historians seem to think that agents acting on behalf of the highest authorities in Berlin attacked the radio station while pretending to be in the Polish military.  But why would Germany want other countries and their own citizens to think Poland had attacked them?

1962 – Trinidad and Tobago becomes independent.  Well, sort of independent.  True, they are no longer controlled by the Dutch, French, Spanish, or British colonial powers.  But Trinidad is still stuck with Tobago and Tobago can't get rid of Trinidad.

1997 – The opinion of the general public towards paparazzi reaches an all time low when Diana, Princess of Wales, her companion Dodi Fayed and driver Henri Paul die in a car crash in Paris attempting to evade aggressive photographers.  This does nothing to dissuade the practice.  Sales of newspapers and magazines with candid pictures of the Princess skyrocket.

2016 – Dilma Rousseff, the first woman to be elected President of Brazil, is impeached and removed from office.  Thus becoming the first democratically elected female head of state to be removed from office by impeachment any where in the world.  Some body had to be first...

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On 8/30/2018 at 9:40 AM, Illjwamh said:

1967 - Thurgood Marshall becomes the first African-American U.S. Supreme Court Justice. White SCOTUS fans immediately decry this as pandering, and complain that they aren't represented anymore.

Lemme guess, are you a Doctor Who fan, by any chance?  (Hooray for Jodie Whittaker!)

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35 minutes ago, CritterKeeper said:

Lemme guess, are you a Doctor Who fan, by any chance?  (Hooray for Jodie Whittaker!)

I was actually thinking of Star Wars, but you can take your pick, really. *sigh*

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01 September

1529 – The Spanish fort of Sancti Spiritu, the first one built in modern Argentina, is destroyed by natives.  Let me see if I understand this.  The Conquistadores had cannon, muskets, the entire European history of fortification and castle building, AND they put the place in the care of the Holy Spirit.  Then with all that, they still lost the fort?

1532 – Lady Anne Boleyn is made Marquess of Pembroke by her fiancé, King Henry VIII of England.  No.   Don't.  Please don't.  This will not work out well.

1715 – King Louis XIV of France dies after a reign of 72 years, which is the longest of any major European monarch.  Granted, he did become King when he was four years old.  The current best contender to dethrone the king of longest enthroned king is Britain's Elizabeth II who, if she is still reigning, will overtake Monsieur XIV on 27 May 2024 (at age 98 years, 36 days).  I know Britain and France are not technically at war right now, but "My monarch lived longer than your monarch" seems like a classic ego battle.

1804 – Juno, one of the largest asteroids in the Main Belt, is discovered by the German astronomer Karl Ludwig Harding.  Where is the Millennium Falcon?  Asteroids do not concern me.

1831 – The high honor of Order of St. Gregory the Great is established by Pope Gregory XVI of the Vatican State to recognize high support for the Vatican or for the Pope, by a man or a woman, and not necessarily a Roman Catholic.  So a Pope named Gregory creates an award named for another Pope named Gregory that can be awarded to any notable person of the Pope's choosing.  This would coincidently get the name of Pope Gregory into the papers several times along side the name of the person being honored.

1875 – Birth of Edgar Rice Burroughs.  Despite what the stories suggest, he was not subsequently abandoned in the African Rain Forest to be raised by Apes.

1914 – St. Petersburg, Russia, changes its name to Petrograd.  The Baltic port would undergo more name changes this century.  I don't think any of them involve Istanbul or Constantinople.

1914 – Martha, the last known passenger pigeon, a female, dies in captivity in the Cincinnati Zoo.  At one time people said they were so numerous that the migrating flocks could block out the Sun like an eclipse.

1920 – The Fountain of Time opens on The Midway Plaisance as a tribute to the 100 years of peace between the United States and Great Britain following the Treaty of Ghent.  Because when I think of Anglo-American relations, I think of Chicago.

1922 – Birth of Yvonne De Carlo.  Despite what the stories may suggest, the Wife of Moses was not the daughter of Count Dracula.

1939 – Too much happened this day. 

  1. General George C. Marshall becomes Chief of Staff of the United States Army.  A legend tells that the General was worried the US Congress would promote him to Marshal Marshall.
  2. The Wound Badge for Wehrmacht, SS, Kriegsmarine, and Luftwaffe soldiers is instituted. The final version of the Iron Cross is also instituted on this date.  Careful.  Rearming those forces was not exactly legal per the terms of Versailles.  New medals might draw more attention to yourself.
  3. Adolf Hitler signs an order to begin the systematic euthanasia of mentally ill and disabled people.  This is not the behavior civilized people expect from an enlightened and benevolent ruler.  There will be serious complaints.
  4. Switzerland mobilizes its forces and the Swiss Parliament elects Henri Guisan to head the Swiss Armed Forces (an event that can happen only during war or national emergency).  A new American Chief of Staff and some new German Medals hardly seem to constitute an emergency for the Swiss.  Was there something else going on?  Oh.  Oh, yes.  This...

1939 – Nazi Germany invades Poland, beginning the European phase of World War II.  The results are... complicated.

1952 – The Old Man and the Sea, the Pulitzer Prize-winning novel by Ernest Hemingway, is first published.  Spoiler Alert:  An old man goes fishing in the sea.  I preferred the Monsterpiece Theatre Adaptation, The Old Man and the C.

1958 – In the middle of the Cold War, Iceland expands its fishing zone, putting it into conflict with the United Kingdom, beginning the Cod Wars.  Did no one in Iceland read Hemmingway?

1974 – The SR-71 Blackbird sets (and holds) the record for flying from New York to London in the time of 1 hour, 54 minutes and 56.4 seconds at a speed of 1,435.587 miles per hour (2,310.353 km/h).  44 years later, it still takes over six hours to fly commercial from JFK to Heathrow.

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02 September

44 BC – Cleopatra VII of Egypt declares her son co-ruler as Pharaoh Ptolemy XV Caesarion.  Following the death of his mother, Caesarion would be the last Pharaoh and reign for eleven days.  If history forgets this young monarch, it is mostly because eleven days is not enough time to have your tomb built to the standards of traditional Egyptian opulence.

1666 – The Great Fire of London breaks out and burns for three days, destroying 10,000 buildings, including Old St Paul's Cathedral.  Is it possible that incinerating what is flammable and filthy will leave everything that survives in a better condition?

1752 – Great Britain, along with its overseas possessions, adopts the Gregorian calendar.  This was actually a two year process for the Empire.  In Britain, 1751 officially began on Lady Day, 25 March, and then ended on 31 December for a year of 282 days.  This was to change New Year's Day in Britain to 01 January.  Then in 1752, Wednesday 02 September was followed by Thursday 14 September, a 355 day year.  This was to make the dates in Britain match those used by their neighbors.  And those of us in the United States today are grateful that they didn't wait until the 1770s or later to do this, because Americans would have stubbornly held on to the Old Style calendar just like we hold on to the pre-Metric measurements Britain dropped not too long after they decided those darn colonists weren't worth fighting to keep.

1807 – The Royal Navy bombards Copenhagen with fire bombs and phosphorus rockets to prevent Denmark from surrendering its fleet to Napoleon.  So let that be a lesson to everyone who would side with Britain against Napoleon.  Your British Allies may not give you enough help to defeat the Corsican Conqueror.  But they will destroy everything you have to keep you from surrendering anything to Bonaparte's Brigades.

1870 – Franco-Prussian War: Battle of Sedan: Prussian forces take Napoleon III of France and 100,000 of his soldiers prisoner.  Later decades would see this day celebrated in the German Empire as Sedantag, which does not involve small children chasing each other in four door automobiles.

1901 – Vice President of the United States Theodore Roosevelt utters the famous phrase, "Speak softly and carry a big stick" at the Minnesota State Fair.  Historians, for some reason, seem to think this was Roosevelt's philosophy towards diplomacy.  It was actually practical advice on how to navigate the unruly crowds of the fair.

1939 – World War II: Following the start of the invasion of Poland the previous day, the Free City of Danzig (now Gdańsk, Poland) is annexed by Nazi Germany.  Neither Danzig nor Gdańsk would be free for a very long time.

1945 – World War II: Combat ends in the Pacific Theater: The Japanese Instrument of Surrender is signed by Japanese Foreign Minister Mamoru Shigemitsu and accepted aboard the battleship USS Missouri in Tokyo Bay.  That should be the end of fighting in Asia for a while...

1945 – Vietnam declares its independence, forming the Democratic Republic of Vietnam.  I have a bad feeling about this...

Also 02 September is National Blueberry Popsicle Day in the United States, as if we needed an excuse.

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2 hours ago, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

1666 – The Great Fire of London breaks out and burns for three days, destroying 10,000 buildings, including Old St Paul's Cathedral.  Is it possible that incinerating what is flammable and filthy will leave everything that survives in a better condition?

"Every so often the city of Ankh-Morpork would burn down to the ground, and the inhabitants would then cheerfully rebuild it with the traditional materials of dry, tarred wood."

-- Terry Pratchett

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On Sept. 3 in history:

301 - San Marino, the 5th smallest country in the world, declares its independence from the Roman Empire. They never really got on board with the whole "emperor" thing, and wanted to go back to the old republic style. They're nothing if not consistent, as the oldest republic in the world.

1189 - Richard I "the Lionheart" is crowned King of England in Westminster. He never sets foot in England again.

1260 - The Mongols lose a fight to the Mamluks in Palestine, and they're so down about it that they just don't feel like conquering anymore.

1783 - The Treaty of Paris confirms that those uppity colonials really do get to call themselves a country after all.

1802 - On Westminster Bridge, William Wordsworth composes the aptly titled "Composed upon Westminster Bridge, September 3, 1802."

1939 - France, the U.K., New Zealand, and Australia all declare war on Germany in response to the latter's invasion of Poland. They proceed to blockade Germany's ports, declare, "That ought to do it," and take no further action for the next six months.

1943 - The Allies invade Italy on the same day that Italy officially gives up. It makes sense in context.

1965 - Charlie Sheen is born to actor Martin Sheen and a Sumatran tiger.

1967 - In one day, the entire country of Sweden switches from driving on the left to driving on the right. Meanwhile, in America, the process of switching from paperwork to computers for government offices has been ongoing for decades.

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28 minutes ago, Illjwamh said:

1967 - In one day, the entire country of Sweden switches from driving on the left to driving on the right.

That is not something you want to spread out over a few minutes, let alone a few days.

Because it really doesn't matter whether you drive on the left or the right - what matters is that either everyone drives on the left, or everyone drives on the right, no mixing it up.

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3 hours ago, Don Edwards said:

Because it really doesn't matter whether you drive on the left or the right - what matters is that either everyone drives on the left, or everyone drives on the right, no mixing it up.

This is correct. Bipartisan driving is a BAD idea. :icon_eek:

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7 hours ago, Don Edwards said:

That is not something you want to spread out over a few minutes, let alone a few days.

Because it really doesn't matter whether you drive on the left or the right - what matters is that either everyone drives on the left, or everyone drives on the right, no mixing it up.

The main thing to consider with this one is just how much preparation was necessary. Road signs needed to be changed, traffic signals adjusted, roads repainted, and most importantly of all, information disseminated so that absolutely everyone knew the change was taking place. A colossal undertaking.

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On September 4 in history:

476 - Romulus Augustulus, the last Roman emperor, is deposed. This marks the end of the Western Roman Empire and the birth of the Kingdom of Italy. This means Rome both came in and went out on a Romulus.

1666 - London continues to be on fire.

1781 - The town of El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora La Reina de los Ángeles de Porciúncula is founded, with a population of 44. Now known colloquially as L.A., it would seem the town's name is inversely proportionate in length to how many people live there.

1862 - General Robert E. Lee decides that invading the North/Union would be a good idea. Is is not a good idea.

1882 - Thomas Edison flips a switch and activates the world's first commercial power plant. It provides power for one square mile of lower Manhattan, with just enough left over to quash Tesla's dreams. Edison then chuckles menacingly while stroking a white cat.

1886 - Apache leader Geronimo finally surrenders to U.S. forces after nearly thirty years of fighting. His ghost would later frighten untold thousands of young servicemen out of transport aircraft.

1957 - The governor of Arkansas determines that military intervention is necessary to prevent a bunch of kids from going to school. There's no added punchline here; it's a joke already.

1957 again - Speaking of punchlines: the Ford Edsel. That is all.

1981 - Kanye West interrupts a young couple meeting their newborn for the first time to inform them that Beyoncé is born.

1998 - Google is founded when the likes of Bill Gates and Steve Jobs did not foresee a couple of kids leaping to the forefront of the latest technological industry, or in other words "exactly what Bill Gates and Steve Jobs did".

2006 - Steve Irwin tragically dies doing what he loves. What follows is an extremely tasteless joke involving crocodiles; I won't subject you to it.

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On September 5 in History:

1638 - Louis XIV of France crests over the horizon.

1666 - The Great Fire of London ends. This is less due to efforts to put it out and more due to not much London left to burn. Only six deaths, though. Gotta take the W where you can find it.

1698 - Tsar Peter I institutes a tax on beards amongst the nobility. The dilemma faced by Russian nobles now is: Do I shave to save money, or grow a massive beard to show off how ridiculously rich I am?

1774 - The First Continental Congress convenes. They will agree on nothing except when to meet next. Just like today!

1839 - China runs afoul of its belligerent drug dealer, the UK.

1941 - The good news: The occupying Soviets are pushed out of Estonia. The bad news: by Nazi Germany.

1946 - Freddie Mercury is born into real life. There is no escape from reality for him, and for the first time, he opens his eyes and sees.

1972 - Terrorist group Black September abducts (and eventually kills) 11 Israeli athletes in Munich, Germany. I don't wanna spoil the movie or anything, but it...doesn't end well for them.

1977 - NASA Launches Voyager 1. Had they known it would eventually result in Star Trek: The Motion Picture, they may have thought twice, scientific discovery be damned.

1990 - Birth of Kim Yeon-ah. The attending doctor is amazed how flawlessly she sticks the landing.

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06 September

394 – Battle of the Frigidus: Roman Emperor Theodosius I defeats and kills Eugenius the usurper. His Frankish magister militum Arbogast escapes but commits suicide two days later.  This is rather typical of Politics through Warfare that was common across the various eras and empires that called themselves "Roman".  But we do ourselves a disservice if we do not recall the historic names.  For example, the Battle of the Frigidus is not the Friday fight in the break room over who must clean out the Frigidus before the weekend.

1492 – Christopher Columbus sails from La Gomera in the Canary Islands, his final port of call before crossing the Atlantic Ocean for the first time.  What is amazing is that Columbus pestered almost every royal court in Europe for sponsorship on this trip, and only Isabella of Castile realized that for the cost of a few ships, they could either get rid of this trouble maker or become very rich.  Of course, the fact Leif Ericson made the trip half a millennium earlier without a royal bankroll isn't important.

1522 – The Victoria, under the command of Juan Sebastián Elcano, returns to Sanlúcar de Barrameda in Spain, the only surviving ship of Ferdinand Magellan's expedition and the first ship to circumnavigate the world.  Four ships and the fleet's commander are lost on the voyage, but does anyone recall the captain who actually completed the mission and led his vessel home?  Is there an Elcano space probe?  No, history remembers Magellan, and others.

1620 – According to the Julian Calendar still in use in Britain, the Pilgrims sail from Plymouth, England on the Mayflower to settle in North America.  If this was the day Columbus started his trip, and what was left of Magellan's armada finished their trip, this must be a good day for sailing.

1847 – Henry David Thoreau leaves Walden Pond and moves in with Ralph Waldo Emerson and his family in Concord, Massachusetts.  If you've found that moving out of society and living the simple life off the land is too stressful, then move in with a friend and live off of them.

1901 – Leon Czolgosz, an unemployed anarchist, shoots and fatally wounds US President William McKinley at the Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo, New York.  Interesting how easily the titles "unemployed" and "anarchist" go together.  Almost as if people who have responsibilities providing for a family or building and maintaining a community can't be bothered to orchestrate the overthrow of society.

1937 – Birth of Sergio Aragonés, Spanish-Mexican author and illustrator.  World's fastest cartoonist.  His pictures in the margins of the pages were often the best part of Mad Magazine.

1939 – World War II: South Africa declares war on Nazi Germany.  This must be because of South Africa's Commonwealth relationship with Britain.  Or is South African claiming some sort of moral high ground?

1958 – Birth of Jeff Foxworthy, American comedian, actor, producer, and screenwriter.  If you know Jeff Foxworthy, you might be a redneck.

1968 – Swaziland becomes independent from Britain.  But much of their international mail is delivered to Switzerland.

1991 – The Soviet Union recognizes the independence of the Baltic states Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania.  Nice of them to do that while there was still technically a Soviet Union. Now who was it that had been keeping the Baltic States from being independent for the last half century?

1991 – The name Saint Petersburg is restored to Russia's second largest city, which had been known as Leningrad since 1924.  Will this town please make up its mind?  Most cities never change their names.  And those that do change their names will usually go at least a century before changing again.

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8 hours ago, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

Interesting how easily the titles "unemployed" and "anarchist" go together.  Almost as if people who have responsibilities providing for a family or building and maintaining a community can't be bothered to orchestrate the overthrow of society.

Or maybe it is just very hard to get a job as anarchist. Imagine the job interview.

"So what is your previous job experience, sir?"
"Ah... none. I haven't actually done any professional anarchism. I've only engaged in amateur anarching so far."
"And precisely what is it you do?"
"Um. I blow random things up to frighten people. Try and kill authority figures to make society break down. Vandalise important landmarks and memorials."
"I see. And precisely how is it that any of this is supposed to help our company sell its product?"
"Ah..."

All in all, it is small wonder that most anarchists remained unemployed. I'm not really sure I would want one working for me, either.

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On September 7 in history:

70 – Titus and his legions occupy and sack Jerusalem. I'd say the residents should get used to this, but who are we kidding? At this point, they already are.

878 - Louis "The Stammerer" becomes king of West Francia, way before George VI and Colin Firth made it cool.

1533 – Henry VIII is furious when Queen Anne Boleyn bears him a daughter, Elizabeth, instead of a son. "How am I going to ensure a strong ruler to guide and protect the realm after my death?"

1706 - While trying to determine the new ruler of Spain, Austrian reinforcements help defeat the French army laying siege to the city of Turin in Savoy, leading to the withdrawal of French forces from Italy. It makes sense in context.

1776 - According to the Americans, the world's first submarine attack takes place. According to the British, "Wait, what? Wtf are you talking about?" Somebody here has to be full of shit.

1778 - France invades the British colony of Dominica. This would be totally understandable if the British were aware that France has joined the Americans' war.

1812 – Napoleon's forces are victorious over Russia at the Battle of Borodino. He's got them on the ropes, now!

1821 – "Yeah no, we're gonna do our own thing." ~Emperor Pedro I of Brazil to Portugal

1864 - General William Tecumseh Sherman evacuates the city of Atlanta. Residents' first red flag should have been when he didn't have an answer to the question, "When can we come back?"

1916 - The U.S. government decides that its employees who are injured while doing their jobs should get some money or something. Sure is nice of them.

1921 - The first Miss America pageant is held in Atlantic City. Remarkably, no contestants are molested or harassed by a future U.S. president.

1940 - The German Luftwaffe begins the Blitz, a bombing campaign of British cities and towns lasting more than 50 nights in a row. The people of the UK respond in the most British manner imaginable: by going about their business.

1997 - Maiden flight of the F-22 Raptor. The U.S. Air Force begins designing its replacement.

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08 September

617 – Battle of Huoyi: Li Yuan defeats a Sui dynasty army, opening the path to his capture of the imperial capital Chang'an and the eventual establishment of the Tang dynasty.  Yet even with the dynasty founded, they never appreciated the value the orange flavored powder would have towards enabling human space flight.

1253 – Pope Innocent IV canonizes Stanislaus of Szczepanów, killed by king Bolesław II.   This is a warning from the Pope to all Kings, everywhere.  If you kill the Bishops that annoy you, they will be canonized.

1504 – Michelangelo's David is unveiled in Piazza della Signoria in Florence.  There have been more than enough wardrobe malfunction comments about this statue over the years.  I just have one question.  Why is this marble depiction of one of the greatest heroes of the Hebrew people uncircumcised?

1565 – The Knights of Malta lift the Ottoman siege of Malta that began on May 18.  At the next breakfast, they all sit down for Malta Meal.  It's good stuff, Maynard.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoAJNn6SETs

1775 – The unsuccessful Rising of the Priests in Malta.  Obviously they skipped breakfast, because winners warm up with Malta Meal.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpBzck6HJtA

1888 – In England, the first six Football League matches are played.  Everything before this point is mostly footnote.  History really begins with Football.

1892 – The Pledge of Allegiance is first recited.  As originally published, the Pledge does not specifically mention "The United States of America" or "Under God", and yet it is popular and patriotic on its own.

1930 – 3M begins marketing Scotch transparent tape.  The "Scotch" brand name was originally an insult towards the manufacturers from the early testers who thought that the makers were far too stingy with the adhesive chemicals.  Even though it was an insult about a lack of stickiness, the name somehow stuck.

1945 – The division of Korea begins when United States troops arrive to partition the southern part of Korea in response to Soviet troops occupying the northern part of the peninsula a month earlier.  Just like with Germany, this division of a country between the United States and the Soviet Union will almost certainly be a temporary situation.

1966 – "The Man Trap" airs on NBC.  This is the first episode to be broadcast of a new science fiction series.  It probably won't last long or amount to much.

1974 – Watergate scandal: US President Gerald Ford signs the pardon of Richard Nixon for any crimes Nixon may have committed while in office.  Strangely, this was an attempt to save money.  If the incoming President has already decided that he intends to pardon the outgoing President, then the legal process becomes an expensive side show distracting the government from the work it needs to do.  Having the prosecutors investigate and file charges.  Depositions.  Court appearances.  Hearings.  Procedures.  Appeals.  Why bother when the Commander in Chief has already decided what he will do when the dust settles?  Pardon everything in advance, and there isn't even a need for an investigation in the first place.  Yes, the Pardon was purely for economic reasons and not political payback.

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On 9/5/2018 at 11:11 AM, Illjwamh said:

1977 - NASA Launches Voyager 1. Had they known it would eventually result in Star Trek: The Motion Picture, they may have thought twice, scientific discovery be damned.

Technically, V'GER was Voyager 6, NASA stopped after 2 so really you can say that NASA took The Motion Picture as a warning.

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12 hours ago, Scotty said:

Technically, V'GER was Voyager 6, NASA stopped after 2 so really you can say that NASA took The Motion Picture as a warning.

I hope they didn't put any warnings in Star Trek V.  Nobody will admit to having watched that.

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09 September

9 AD – Arminius' alliance of six Germanic tribes ambushes and annihilates three Roman legions of Publius Quinctilius Varus in the Battle of the Teutoburg Forest.  The Roman Legions were not invincible.  Rome was, however, able to hire mercenary legions to retaliate against you faster than you could appeal to your fellow barbarian tribes to  unite with you  in opposition to Rome.

337 – Constantine II, Constantius II, and Constans succeed their father Constantine I as co-emperors. The Roman Empire is divided between the three Augusti.  A typical political family made up of Con-men.

999 or 1000 – Battle of Svolder or Øresund.  On or about this date a naval battle between Nordic nobles determined many of the details that would eventually mark the end of the Viking era and the transition of Northern European culture into the High Middle Ages.  The earliest existing Icelandic record of the event was written two centuries after the fact and is regarded by almost everyone as unreliable.    Please, for the sake of all future historians, before you kill or are killed, document everything.

1087 – William Rufus becomes King of England, taking the title William II.  The title of King Rufus will remain unclaimed among English speaking monarchs until the Naked Mole Rat Uprising.

1776 – The Continental Congress officially names its union of states the United States.  They never gave serious consideration to naming the country "Fred".

1791 – Washington, D.C., the capital of the United States, is named after President George Washington.  Legend claims that George Washington chose the point where the city should start by throwing a silver dollar across the Potomac River.  This could not happen today because everyone knows that a dollar doesn't go as far anymore.  Thank you.  I'll be here all week.  Be sure to tip your waitress.

1801 – Alexander I of Russia confirms the privileges of Baltic provinces.  Would any of these include the "Privilege" of not being a vassal state to Russia?

1839 – John Herschel takes the first glass plate photograph.  Eventually he would discover things outside his kitchen to observe and study.

1863 – American Civil War: The Union Army enters Chattanooga, Tennessee.  This trip did not involve a Choo-Choo at Track 29

1939 – World War II: The Battle of Hel begins, the longest-defended pocket of Polish Army resistance during the German invasion of Poland.  As has been observed by so many others, War is Hel.

1956 – Elvis Presley appears on the Ed Sullivan Show for the first time, from the waist up.

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