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Illjwamh

This Day In History

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On April 16 in History:
 
1457 BCE - Egyptian forces under Thutmose III rout Canaanite rebel vassals at the Battle of Megiddo (probably), in the first battle we have any written record of. This is also where the supposed last battle of certain Abrahamic sects, "Armageddon", both gets its name and will take place. While I don't buy into such things, I can appreciate the poetic symmetry.
 
73 BCE - The Siege of Masada ends after several months when the 960 defenders and family members all opt to kill themselves rather than surrender to the Romans, putting an end to the Great Jewish Revolt. While their actions seem extreme, in their defense, the Romans weren't exactly known for their magnanimity in victory.
 
69 - Otho becomes the second victim of the Year of the Four Emperors after three months on the throne, seized by Vitellius two days ago. Why did so many people want this job, again?
 
1346 - Serbian king Stefan Dušan "The Mighty" is proclaimed emperor, since he basically controls all of the Balkans now. Let's hope his successors can hold it together.
 
1746 - The Battle of Culloden sees a crushing defeat for the Jacobites and an end for any designs Bonnie Prince Charlie may have had on the throne. Just as a safety measure, highland traditions will be banned and brutally cracked down on, because reasons.
 
1862 - A year into the war fought largely over the issue of slavery, slavery is outlawed in the U.S. capital of Washington, D.C..
 
1910 - Boston Arena, now called Matthews Arena, opens. It is the oldest indoor ice hokey rink (indeed oldest athletic building) still in use today, because Bostonians can never let go of anything.
 
1972 - Apollo 16 launches, though by this time the public has largely somehow lost its fascination with sending human beings to the surface of the moon.

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Wouldn't that be "buildings in general"?

Granted, some more so than others - churches and warehouses and shopping malls tend to have huge open areas where fire can spread unimpeded, apartment buildings not so much.

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1 hour ago, Don Edwards said:

Granted, some more so than others - churches and warehouses and shopping malls tend to have huge open areas where fire can spread unimpeded, apartment buildings not so much.

I believe that was the point being made, yes. Along with a large initial volume of air, usually quickly supplemented by new air pouring through the places where the stained glass windows used to be.

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On April 19 in History:
 
797 - Empress Irene has her son, reigning emperor Constantine VI, deposed and blinded so that she can take the throne for herself. And the award for Mom of the Year goes to....
 
1506 - A crowd of Catholics and foreign sailors in Lisbon round up, torture, murder, and burn at the stake hundreds of not just Jews, but people who are "accused of being Jews", whatever that means.
 
1539 - The Treaty of Frankfurt is signed between the Catholic HRE Charles V and the military alliance of Protestant princes called the Schmalkaldic League. In it, they agree to stop killing each other over how to Christian. France, who up until now had been supporting the Schmalkaldic League, says, "Well, never mind, then."
 
1578 - Uesugi Kenshin, one of the titans of Japan's Sengoku Period, believed by many to be the Avatar of God of War Bishamonten on Earth and referred to as such, while marching to meet would-be conqueror Oda Nobunaga in battle with his ally, the son of his once equally famous rival Takeda Shingen, dies rather anti-climactically of esophageal cancer. Sometimes history can be a real let-down.
 
1713 - Habsburg HRE Charles VI, who has no sons, officially declares that, "It would actually make a lot more sense to allow a daughter to inherit rather than someone outside the family." Please note that he does not yet have any daughters, either.
 
1770 - 14 year-old Marie Antoinette marries future King Louis XVI of France in a proxy wedding. No one is to be served a slice of the wedding cake until she gives the official word.
 
1775 - Some guy in southwestern Australia: "Hey, did you hear that? Sounded like a gunshot."
 
1839 - The Treaty of London establishes Belgium as an independent country, and Britain guarantees their independence. Right, like they'll stick by that.
 
1960 - Students in South Korea hold a nationwide protest against President Syngman Rhee, calling for him to resign. It works. Park Geun-hye would do well to remember this.
 
1981 - Hayden Christensen is born to a Canadian mother and midichlorians.
 
1987 - The Tracey Ullman Show unveils a new series of shorts involving a badly drawn, crudely voiced, yellow cartoon family. I don't see it going anywhere.
 
1995 - The Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City is bombed by domestic terrorists Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols is the deadliest such attack in U.S. history. We should really start looking into these "white people", and maybe impose some sort of ban on them coming into the country, just until we can figure out what the hell is going on.
 
2005 - A former Hitler Youth becomes Pope. In his defense, he had no choice and didn't like it, but one would imagine the Vatican has to consider the optics on such things, right?

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On April 21 in History:
 
753 BCE - Traditional date for the founding of Rome. One must also consider that other parts of this story insist that the man responsible was raised by a wolf goddess, so take it with a grain of salt.
 
1506 - The people of Lisbon feel like they've killed enough Jews now. It's been three whole days; what say we wind this down.
 
1509 - Henry VIII of England ascends to the throne on his father's death. A strapping young lad, he'll make a fine king, and no doubt produce lots of children to continue the dynasty.
 
1836 - At Battle of San Jacinto, which lasts 18 minutes, a force of about 800 Texans defeats a Mexican army that was mostly sleeping, eating, or bathing. Some of the Texans remember the Alamo a little too much, as even their officers can't stop them from killing Mexican soldiers who are desperately trying to surrender.
 
1898 - U.S. ships blockade Cuban ports. This is the formal declaration of war against Spain that will be retroactively announced in four days.
 
1918 - The Red Baron takes a bullet to the chest in a dogfight with two Canadian pilots, and even though he has like thirty seconds to live, still manages to land his plane. No one ever actually shot him down.
 
1934 - A fake photo of the Loch Ness Monster sent in to the Daily Mail as a practical joke gets way out of hand.
 
1960 - Brazil moves all three branches of government to its deliberately constructed new capital, Brasilia. This does not stop most people from assuming its capital is still Rio.
 
1966 - Ethiopian Emperor Haile Selassie visits Jamaica, home of the burgeoning Rastafarian movement. It's a bit like if Jesus showed up in Provo, Utah.
 
1987 - A car bomb explodes in the Sri Lankan capital of Colombo, killing 106 people. Militant secessionist group The Tamil Tigers are blamed. I'll never understand people who assume random murder is an effective means of achieving their political goals.
 
1989 - 100,000 students gather in Tiananmen Square to commemorate political and economic reformer Hu Yaobang. As long as they're peaceful, there shouldn't be a problem.
 
2014 - The city of Flint, Michigan switches to a new water source as a cost cutting measure. Think of how much better our citizens' lives will be now we'll have a little extra money in the budget!
 
2019 - Eight bombs explode in an apparently coordinated attack at churches and hotels around Sri Lanka on Easter Sunday, killing over 200 people. The more things change, the more they stay the same. *sigh*

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On April 22 in History:
 
238 - The Roman Senate declares Emperor Maximinus Thrax an outlaw, and nominates two of its own number to take his place. It perhaps won't surprise you that this will later be known as the Year of the Six Emperors.
 
1519 - Hernán Cortés establishes a settlement at present-day Veracruz, Mexico. Nothing to worry about, Moctezuma; we're just minding our own business over here.
 
1616 - Death of Miguel de Cervantes. Perhaps he got cancer from a windmill.
 
1836 - Mexican General Santa Anna is captured hiding in a swamp the day after the battle of San Jacinto. The Texans have no reason to think he's anything more than a regular solider until his own men accidentally reveal his identity. Whoopsie.
 
1864 - The phrase "In God We Trust" first appears on U.S. minted coins. More specifically, the two cent coin. So you see, it's clearly a long-standing tradition.
 
1870 - Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov is born. I can't blame him for switching to the pseudonym "Lenin". It's definitely a lot catchier.
 
1889 - The cities of Guthrie and Oklahoma City go from nothing to over 10,000 people in a matter of hours once "unassigned" lands are open for settlement and people madly rush in to grab a piece for themselves. So like Black Friday, but less chaotic.
 
2000 - Federal agents with military-grade weapons break into a house and rip a six year old boy from the arms of his relatives, and this is considered a reasonable solution to an international custody dispute.
 
2016 - Every country on Earth signs an agreement in Paris to reduce greenhouse emissions. The agreement lets each country set their own rules and goals and does not penalize not following or meeting them. Yeah, we're all gonna die.

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On April 23 in History:
 
599 - King Uneh Chan of Calakmul attacks and sacks his rival city-state of Bàakʼ (Palenque) under Queen Yohl Ik'nal. That'll teach 'em. I feel like if we had a more complete history of Mayan politics, it would be just as interesting if not more so than all the Greek stuff we study.
 
711 - Dagobert III becomes King of the Franks on the death of his father, Childebert III. Unfortunately, I've already made a Dilbert joke regarding old Frankish kings before, so I've got nothing here.
 
1014 - The good news: Irish High King Brian Boru has defeated a band of Viking invaders at the Battle of Clontarf. The bad news: he was killed in said battle. Well, shit.
 
1016 - Edmund Ironside inherits the throne of England when his father, Æthelred the Unready, is killed. You have to admit his name inspires a little more confidence.
 
1616 - William Shakespeare dies, literally the day after Miguel de Cervantes. Somebody warn Jonathan Smith!
 
1928 - Shirley Temple is born. The tap routine she performs for the delivering doctors and nurses is reportedly very impressive.
 
1985 - Coca-Cola introduces a new formula that tastes more like Pepsi but not as good. For some reason it doesn't go over well.
 
2005 - Jawed Karim uploads a video of himself in front of some elephants at the zoo and forever changes the way society consumes and interacts with media.
 
2018 - Some douche in Toronto who's mad that he isn't getting laid runs a bunch of people over with his truck. Can't imagine why women wouldn't be flocking to such an obvious catch.

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This is a day late due to Avengers-related distraction.
 
On April 24 in History:
 
1479 BCE - Thutmose III becomes Pharaoh. As he is only two years old however, this essentially makes his step-mother, Hatshepsut, Pharaoh. And by "essentially", I mean it does.
 
1547 - Forces of the HRE defeat the Schmalkaldic League at the Battle of Mühlberg, essentially forcing it to dissolve. Oh, Schmalkaldic League, if only you had not signed a peace treat back when France was still interested in disrupting the emperor's power.
 
1800 - U.S. president John Adams signs an appropriations bill of $5000 to "get Congress some books or whatever."
 
1885 - Annie Oakley is hired to join Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show. Her husband also joins, even though anything he can do, she can do better.
 
1915 - Roughly 250 Armenian intellectuals are arrested in Istanbul (not Constantinople). This is not a good sign of things to come.
 
1953 - Winston Churchill is knighted. For his humble service to the realm, he will forever be among the company of other all-time greats like Bono and Elton John.
 
1970 - The Gambia becomes a republic, but remains part of the Commonwealth. Not Gambia, THE Gambia. That's very important.
 
1990 - The Hubble Space Telescope is launched. Finally we'll be able to see what's out there without any of that pesky atmospheric interference. Spoiler alert: a lot.

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On April 26 in History:
 
1564 - William Shakespeare is baptized. Since we don't actually know the date of his birth, he could very well already be 17 years old, though I consider that unlikely.
 
1777 - 16 year old Sybil Ludington rides 40 miles by herself to warn colonial militias of approaching British forces. But does she get a Longfellow poem? Pfsh. Effing patriarchy, man.
 
1803 - Thousands of meteor fragments fall from the sky around the small town of L'Aigle in southern Normandy. This convinces scientists in Europe that meteors exist. "You don't say?" remark the residents of L'Aigle.
 
1865 - John Wilkes Booth is cornered and shot on the same day as the largest and last great surrender of Confederate troops, that of Joe Johnston's army to Gen. Sherman at Bennet Place, North Carolina. "This will be a day long remembered. It has seen the end of Booth; it will soon see the end of the rebellion."
 
1933 - Establishment of the Gestapo, Nazi Germany's secret police force that everyone knows about.
 
1960 - Syngman Rhee resigns after 12 years as a dictator. Kim Il Sung laughs heartily, knowing that his Korea will always be better.
 
1964 - Tanganyika and Zanzibar perform the Fusion Dance to form Tanzania. Rumor has it this isn't even their final form.
 
1982 - South Korean police officer Woo Bum-kon wanders around from village to village casually shooting people and occasionally blowing them up with grenades. All told, he kills 56 people (including himself) and injures 36 more. In his defense, his girlfriend had woken him up that day by swatting a fly on his chest. Who among us wouldn't do the same?
 
1986 - The residents of Chernobyl, Ukraine are informed they will have to move.
 
 

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On April 27 in History:
 
629 - Sharhbaraz usurps the throne from Ardashir III and becomes king of Sasanid Persia. So when do you guys want to assassinate him? I'm busy next month, but after that my schedule's wide open.
 
711 - Moorish troops under Tariq ibn Ziyad land at what is now Gibraltar in Hispania and set about conquisting the hell out of it.
 
1296 - King John Balliol's attempt to win independence for Scotland is stopped short by English armies at the Battle of Dunbar. And they never tried again.
 
1521 - Ferdinand Magellan dies in the Philippines just short of his goal in the East Indies via an acute case of hit by a spear.
 
1759 - Mary Wallstonecraft is born, in exactly the same manner that a male child would be, though it remains socially shocking to point this out for another 200 years.
 
1805 - A contingent of United States Marines and their Berber allies attack the city of Derna on the shores of Tripoli. It goes so well, I wouldn't be surprised if someone wrote a song about it.
 
1861 - U.S. president Abraham Lincoln declares that - for now, at least - it is not necessary for the government to determine whether people holding others prisoner actually have the legal authority to do so.
 
1882 - Ralph Waldo Emerson transcends his physical existence and becomes one with the universe.
 
1909 - Ottoman Sultan Abdul Hamid II has somehow managed to avoid losing control of the empire completely despite decades of decline. His brother, Mehmed V, says "Hold my beer," and overthrows him.
 
1923 - Birth of Betty Mae Tiger Jumper, future first female chief of the Seminole, whose name is infinitely cooler than yours.
 
1945 - Benito Mussolini is arrested by Italian resistance partisans in the town of Dongo, in Lombardy. They are able to catch him because despite his disguise as a regular German soldier, he just couldn't stop posturing.
 
1949 - In response to Australia's policy of not allowing non-European immigrants, even if they have Australian spouses or children, the House of Representatives in the Philippines passes legislation that bans all Australians from the country. Ha! Nice.
 
1960 - Togo gains independence from UN-trusteeship under France. $20 if you can find it on a map without looking it up.
 
1961 - Sierra Leone gets independence from the UK. No prize for finding this one, since they've been in the news relatively recently. Though these days if you can remember anything in the news from over a week ago, you're doing all right.
 
1967 - Expo 67 opens in Montreal, which is only significant to this list in that it will lend its name to the city's ill-fated baseball team.
 
1974 - Ten thousand people march on Washinton D.C., demanding the impeachment of President Richard Nixon. Ah, remember when the government still somewhat worked how it was supposed to?
 
1986 - Yesterday's Chernobyl joke becomes reality for the people of Pripyat, which is actually closer to the nuclear facility than the city it's named after.
 
1992 - Betty Boothroyd is the first female Speaker of the (British) House of Commons in its 700 year history. Makes the U.S.'s 210 year streak feel a little less embarrassing in comparison.
 
1994 - Black people vote in the general election in South Africa for the very first time. Turnout is expected to be high until the novelty wears off.
 
2007 - The Estonian government removes the Bronze Soldier, a Soviet Red Army war memorial, in their capital of Tallinn. Because why would anyone want a historical monument to people who oppressed them?
 
2018 - By signing the Panmunjom Declaration, the leaders of North and South Korea agree to talk about taking steps to start the initial process of talks to discuss the ending the Korean War.

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On April 28 in History:
 
224 - Ardashir I defeats and kills Artabanus V at the Battle of Hormozdgan. This marks the end of the Parthian Empire and the beginning of the Sasanid Empire. This new one will be decidedly less Greek and a lot more Persian.
 
1192 - Conrad I of Jerusalem is assassinated in Tyre a mere two days after his confirmation to the throne. Like, literally assassinated; he's killed by the Asāsiyyūn.
 
1402 - Nezahualcoyotl ("Coyote Who Fasts") is born. He will be a poet, a philsopher, a warrior, an architect, and the ruler of the city-state of Texcoco. Perhaps his most visionary achievement was building a temple in which no blood sacrifices - even those of small animals - were permitted. Though he still allowed human sacrifices in all the other temples. Dude, you were so close!
 
1789 - The crew of the HMS Bounty tell their captain to fuck off so they can go back to Tahiti. It's a magical place.
 
1792 - In the midst of their sweeping revolution, France decides to invade the Austrian Netherlands (Belgium and Luxembourg), either to spread the revolution or to preempt an attack by the other monarchies. Or possibly because they were running out of people to kill at home.
 
1869 - Chinese and Irish laborers lay ten miles of track in one day while working on the transcontinental railroad for Central Pacific, who definitely isn't working them too hard.
 
1930 - The very first official night baseball game is hosted in Independence, Kansas by the Independence Producers vs. the Muskogee Chiefs. This way, if it's a disaster, no one will ever have to know about it.
 
1945 - Benito Mussolini and his mistress Clara Petacci are shot and killed by a member of the Italian Resistance. Hitler takes note and swears that will never happen to him and his wife.
 
1947 - A guy named after a thunder god sets out from Peru on a raft named after a sun god across the Pacific Ocean, in order to prove that the natives there could have done it if they wanted to, even though they never did.
 
1948 - Terry Pratchett is born. I'm not familiar enough with his work to make an acceptable Discworld reference here, but someday!
 
1950 - Jay Leno is born, have you seen this? Have you heard about this?
 
1986 - High levels of radiation are detected at a nuclear facility in Sweden, forcing Soviet authorities to admit that they'd made a boo-boo.
 
1996 - A gunman opens fire at a cafe in Port Arthur, Tasmania, killing 35 people and leaving 23 wounded. The country is so horrified that it immediately takes steps to ensure such a thing will never happen again, and for once I'm not being sarcastic.
 

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On April 29 in History:
 
1429 - The Siege of Orléans is interrupted when some girl shows up with a couple hundred soldiers and some supplies. Right, like that's actually going to make any difference.
 
1483 - The main Canary Island, Gran Canaria, is conquered by Castile. This doesn't really have anything to do with the Reconquista; they just felt like being dicks.
 
1861 - Maryland votes not to rage quit the U.S.
 
1901 - Birth of Emperor Shōwa, who won't actually be called that for another 88 years.
 
1945 - Hitler marries Eva Braun in the Führerbunker. Knowing what they have planned for tomorrow kinda takes the oomph out of "til death do us part." Also, he designates Karl Dönitz as his successor, because fuck you, Göring.
 
1974 - Richard Nixon releases edited transcripts of White House tape recordings related to the Watergate scandal. Notably, he has his Attorney General come on TV that morning and provide some spin...er, "context" first. Except he doesn't do that, because even Nixon had SOME respect for our institutions.
 
1980 - Alfred Hitchcock dies of kidney failure, which is completely anticlimactic and further proof that no one's running this show and the universe is completely random.
 
2011 - Prince William of Wales marries Catherine Middleton, and everyone loses their goddamn minds. Also, memes of the sister of the bride's ass.
 
2015 - The Orioles and the White Sox throw a ballgame and nobody comes. One has to wonder why a little bit of drizzle is enough to postpone a game, but "ballpark closed to the public due to protests" isn't.
 

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On May 1 in History:
 
305 - Diocletian and Maximian retire as Roman Emperors. Everyone else will come to regret this.
 
1169 - The Norman invasion of Ireland begins. They just can't help themselves.
 
1328 - At the Treaty of Edinburgh–Northampton, England officially recognizes the Kingdom of Scotland as an independent state.
 
1707 - "Lol, j/k." ~ The Act of Union
 
1731 - Death of Johann Ludwig Bach. That's right, not the one you remember; the other one.
 
1776 - The Illuminati is established in Ingolstadt, Upper Bavaria, to the delight of conservative conspiracy theorists everywhere, as they now have a bogeyman to blame all their problems on.
 
1865 - Brazil, Argentina, and Uruguay (one of these things is not like the others) form the Triple Alliance to oppose Paraguay, who've gotten a little too big for their britches.
 
1886 - Rallies are held across the United States demanding an eight hour workday, including in Haymarket Square in Chicago. I've got a good feeling about this.
 
1904 - Antonín Dvořák dies, which hits a little harder than Bach, in my opinion.
 
1945 - Joseph Goebbels and his wife commit suicide, as it's the trendy thing for Nazi leaders lately, but not before force feeding their children cyanide capsules. As if they were worried history wouldn't remember them as evil enough.
 
1956 - The polio vaccine goes public, so unless people stop believing in medical science for some reason, looks like we're done with polio. Thanks, Dr. Salk.
 
1978 - Uemora Naomi, via dogsled, is the first person to travel to the North Pole alone. A surprised Santa Claus swears him to secrecy.
 
2003 - U.S. president George W. Bush announces that major combat operations in Iraq are complete, under a banner declaring "Mission Accomplished". Whew, well that's a relief to hear.
 
2009 - Sweden acknowledges that gay people can get married, too.
 
2011 - U.S. President Barack Obama fails to conceal how pleased with himself he is as he walks out to deliver the only announcement that George W. Bush ever really wanted to make.

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On May 3 in History:
 
490 - Obligatory mention of the birth of a Mayan king. Today's contestant: K'an Joy Chitam I of Bàakʼ (Palenque).
 
738 - Death of Uaxaclajuun Ub'aah K'awiil (Eighteen Rabbit), king of Oxwitik (Copán). Oh, you thought we were done?
 
752 - Hat trick! Bird Jaguar IV becomes king of the Mayan city-state of Yaxchilan, and all I'm thinking about is where's the backstory on the first three Bird Jaguars?
 
1481 - An earthquake strikes the island of Rhodes resulting in tsunamis and as many as 30,000 casualties. It is the third (and largest) in a series of quakes that will plague the island from March of '81 until January of '82. Seriously, this thing was huge. Massive. One might even say...Colossal?
 
1481 again - Death of Mehmed II. Greek residents of Constantinople fail to appear bereaved.
 
1491 - King Nkuwu Nzinga of Kongo allows some Portuguese fellows to put his head in some water. This will have far-reaching implications.
 
1826 - Birth of Charles XV of Sweden. Wait for it...
 
1860 - Happy birthday/coronation to Charles XV of Sweden and Norway (only in Sweden; Norway will have to wait), who is the ninth Swedish king to be named Charles. This is because the previous Charles had decided to include a few who never verifiably existed. God dammit, Europe.
 
1903 - Birth of Bing Crosby, one of the few famous people from Spokane whom residents can be reasonably confident other people have heard of.
 
1921 - Ireland is officially divided into Northern Ireland and Southern Ireland, which is known today simply as Ireland, which is not confusing at all.
 
1960 - "The Fantasticks" opens in Greenwich Village. It will go on to be the longest running musical OF ALL TIME. That's a line from something; I can't recall just what.
 
1978 - The very first spam email is sent. Man, forget Hitler; can someone go back in time and kill this guy?
 
2015 - Two idiots with guns try to attack a bunch of other idiots who are holding an anti-Islam rally in response to yet two more idiots who shot up the French magazine Charlie Hebdo four months ago. Guys: none of you are helping!

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On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
1118 - Baldwin I, the first crusader King of Jerusalem, dies. Crusading, of course.

<Insert Baldwin brothers joke here>

On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
 
1502 - Henry VII's son and heir, Arthur Prince of Wales, dies. Let's hope his younger brother is up to the task. Also, why does fate keep conspiring to keep us from having a real King Arthur?

Dang, I hadn't thought of that.  Now I really want one of the current princes to name a kid Arthur.  Hmm....*checks current lines*...here we go, 25th in line for the throne is Arthur Chatto, son of Lady Sarah Chatto and grandson of Princess Margaret.  If all of her sister Lizzie's branch were to suddenly no longer be in the running, somehow, then there'd only be five more ahead of him!

On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
1930 - Haile Selassie becomes Emperor of Ethiopia. You know what? Maybe it's the weed talking, but I'm getting some serious messiah/god vibes off this guy.
 

I love the idea that there was an independent Empire so recently in history, that managed to stay that way even during the big colony grab around the previous turn of the century.  Downton Abbey overlaps with that era!

On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
2005 - John Paul II dies after 37 years. A lot of the world's Catholics have never known another Pope.

I remember the very first Beloit College Mindset List had an entry for, "There has only ever been one Pope."

On 4/4/2019 at 3:44 PM, Illjwamh said:
1841 - William Henry Harrison dies exactly one month after being sworn in as U.S. president. He spent his entire time in office with pneumonia. Thus his remains the only administration with fewer accomplishments to its name than the current one.

Alas, if only it were true that the current administration isn't accomplishing anything.  What he's accomplished is to ram through an astonishing number of judicial appointments, all ultra-conservative, throughout the entire federal judiciary.  Most of these appointments are for life.  He has shaped the rulings of the court for generations to come, and through that ensured that conservative causes will find favor in court cases of all sorts for the next several decades. 

On 4/4/2019 at 3:44 PM, Illjwamh said:
 
1875 - Czech composer Bedřich Smetana's Vitava, also known as Die Moldau, premiers in Prague. I don't really have anything funny to say; I just really like it. Y'all should give it a listen.

 Wow.  Thank you for recommending that!

On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
1923 - Warner Bros. Pictures opens. They will eventually be responsible for such cinematic masterpieces as Battlefield Earth, Catwoman, and The Adventures of Pluto Nash.

We can forgive a lot if a studio gives us some halfway decent adaptations of favorite books, maybe even an original series of sequel movies after that.

On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
1925 - A far-right party in Germany establishes its own private paramilitary force, and this apparently does not alarm anyone.

Gosh, good thing it hasn't gotten that bad in this day and...nevermind...

On 4/2/2019 at 10:21 AM, Illjwamh said:
2013 - Roger Ebert dies, leaving us all to our own devices when it comes to knowing what movies are good. I'd say we're not handling it very well.

My favorite was his getting together with the computer science department at the University of Illinois (alma mater to us both) in order to throw a big birthday party for HAL 9000 on the day which was given in the novel 2001: A Space Odyssey as the place and day HAL was first activated.  Ebert hosted the showing of the movie in the old Virginia Theatre, which not only has a huge screen and antique seats, but an organ which rises up from below the floor in order to accompany silent movies and is thus one of the coolest theaters I've ever had the pleasure to patronize.  It eventually led to Ebert's Overlooked Film Festival happening there on a regular basis, albeit after I had moved away.

On 4/7/2019 at 1:34 PM, Illjwamh said:

On April 7 in History:

30 - Near as we can figure, this is the day some bleeding heart rabble rouser named Josh is crucified for what amounts to rocking the boat. Sad. I bet in another year or so no one will even remember him.

Considering what's been done with/to his teachings and name, you can either say he *has* been forgotten, or that he'd probably prefer he had been.

On 4/7/2019 at 1:34 PM, Illjwamh said:

1141 - Empress Matilda becomes the first female ruler of England, albeit mostly in name. She is not to be confused with her mother, Queen Matilda, or with the wife of King Stephen (with whom she fought a war for control of the kingdom), also called Queen Matilda. God dammit, Europe.

King Henry I had one legitimate child, who he declared his heir, and all his noblemen swore loyalty to that heir and their successors.  When Henry died, Matilda was in Normandy, where she had property, and in her absence a bunch of the noblemen broke their vows and stuck up a big NO GIRLS ALLOWED sign and declared they'd rather follow her cousin Stephen.  

The resulting civil war, known as the Anarchy, is the setting for an excellent mystery series featuring Brother Cadfael of the Monastery of St Peter and St Paul in Shrewsbury, a city near the border with Wales.  Cadfael fought in the Crusades and then became a sailor for another decade, seeing the world and collecting medicinal plants and knowledge of their use, before settling into a sort of retirement as the monk in charge of the gardens.  His knowledge of the outside world and his keen mind help him solve a delightful series of mysteries, starting with A Morbid Taste for Bones and One Corpse Too Many.

I pay you back for Die Moldau with Brother Cadfael.  (And if you just can't stand to read a book, some of them were adapted for TV with Derek Jacobi in the lead, which should tell you how cool they are!)

 

(to be continued....)

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On May 4th, 1970, National Guardsmen killed four students at Kent State University in Ohio protesting the Vietnam War and in particular the recent invasion of Cambodia.
 
On May 4th, 1919, students in Beijing protesting their government's lack of resistance to impositions by foreign powers (mostly Japan) attacked government officials and in turn were set on by police. This gave rise to the May Fourth Movement, which is honored by the Communist Regime in China--which in no way prevents it from crushing student protests now.

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20 minutes ago, Tom Sewell said:

On May 4th, 1970, National Guardsmen killed four students at Kent State University in Ohio protesting the Vietnam War and in particular the recent invasion of Cambodia.

Only two of the four students killed were definitely participating in the protests. The other two almost certainly were not, based on extant reports. One of the latter two was attending the school on an ROTC scholarship.

As is typical of campus protests, the center of the protest was in front of one of the campus' major buildings and thus crossed several major routes between pairs of buildings. It was early afternoon on a Monday. There was plenty of legitimate reason for non-protesters to be in the area. And the university administration had put significant effort into spreading the word that the protest rally had been canceled, which would logically lead people to think there was no reason not to be in the area - until they got there and found it was happening anyway.

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1 minute ago, Don Edwards said:

Only two of the four students killed were definitely participating in the protests. The other two almost certainly were not, based on extant reports. One of the latter two was attending the school on an ROTC scholarship.

As is typical of campus protests, the center of the protest was in front of one of the campus' major buildings and thus crossed several major routes between pairs of buildings. It was early afternoon on a Monday. There was plenty of legitimate reason for non-protesters to be in the area.

I guess the National Guardsmen weren't particularly good shots. Of course, they didn't get as much practice as the draftees who were actually fighting the war.

If you want to know more, I suggest reading James Michener's book Kent State: What Happened and Why.

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On May 4 in History:

1471 - Edward, Prince of Wales is killed in the Battle of Tewkesbury by the army of King Edward IV during Wars of The Roses, a period in English history that is so convoluted that you're honestly better off not thinking about it. Just think how complex Game of Thrones is, and then add "The Real World" to that.

1814 - Napoleon is given the tour of his new digs on the island of Elba.

1886 - At a labor rally in Haymarket Square, Chicago, somebody thinks it would be a good idea to chuck a bomb at police officers. The cops understandably take issue with this, their solution of shooting into the crowd is admittedly not the best.

1910 - The Royal Canadian Navy is formed. It consists of a dinghy, a canoe hollowed out from a tree trunk, and a raft made from an old barn door. They still have the canoe.

1919 - Students gather in Tienanmen Square to protest the handover of territory to Japan in the Treaty of Versailles. They are set upon by police. Today's communist Chinese regime honors this event, and commemorates it by setting police on student protests whenever they occur.

1932 - Mobster and noted tax dodger Al Capone is give the tour of his new digs in Atlanta U.S. Penitentiary.

1953 - Ernest Hemingway wins the Pulitzer Prize for his story of an old man too stubborn to know when to cut the line.

1970 - Events at Kent State University inspire Neil Young to write a new song.

1979 - The good news: The UK has its first female prime minister! The bad news: It's Margaret Thatcher.

1990 - Latvia asserts that its annexation by the Soviet Union in 1940 was illegal and unconstitutional. I mean, there's declaring independence, and then there's declaring "Fuck you, we should have been independent all along."

1994 - A peace accord is signed by the prime minister of Israel and the leader of the PLO, granting self rule in Jericho and the Gaza strip. That ought to clear everything up.

2000 - Ken Livingstone is the first Mayor of London. What, like ever? The city's been there for thousands of years!

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On 5/4/2019 at 3:34 PM, CritterKeeper said:

Dang, I hadn't thought of that.  Now I really want one of the current princes to name a kid Arthur.  Hmm....*checks current lines*...here we go, 25th in line for the throne is Arthur Chatto, son of Lady Sarah Chatto and grandson of Princess Margaret.  If all of her sister Lizzie's branch were to suddenly no longer be in the running, somehow, then there'd only be five more ahead of him!

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle just had a boy today who's as yet unnamed and is 7th's in line to the throne, fingers crossed.

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Don't forget that full name of the current Prince of Wales is Charles Philip Arthur George.

Speculation is that, since previous Kings named Charles did not have pleasant reigns, the current Prince Chuck would be inclined to use the frequent Hanover/Windsor name of George if he ever accedes to the throne.  But why not Arthur?

Of course, would that be enough to spark a Camelot era of high chivalry?

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2 hours ago, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

Don't forget that full name of the current Prince of Wales is Charles Philip Arthur George.

Speculation is that, since previous Kings named Charles did not have pleasant reigns, the current Prince Chuck would be inclined to use the frequent Hanover/Windsor name of George if he ever accedes to the throne.  But why not Arthur?

Of course, would that be enough to spark a Camelot era of high chivalry?

As far as I'm concerned, no - I wouldn't buy a used camel from that man.

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I've been sick, so there's a backlog.
 
On May 6 in History:
 
1405 - Birth of Skanderbeg, the only historically famous Albanian anyone's ever heard of.
 
1527 - Rome is once again sacked by Germans and warriors from the Iberian Peninsula. This is once again marked as the end of a historical era.
 
1536 - Incan forces under Sapa Inca (emperor) Manco Inca Yupanqui lay siege to their own former capital of Cusco in order to retake it from Spanish invaders. I won't tell you how it eventually ends, but given that more people today speak Spanish than Quechua, you can probably guess.
 
1856 - Sigmund Freud is born. We don't wanna know what his mom got up to with him in that delivery room, but we can infer it was freaky as shit.
 
1861 - Arkansas secedes from the U.S.A. They know a winning cause when they see one.
 
1882 - U.S. Congress officially bans all immigration from China, back when such ridiculous policies were still allowed.
 
1910 - George V becomes king of the United Kingdom. In an interesting twist, his name actually is George.
 
1915 - Babe Ruth hits his first Major League home run while playing for the Boston Red Sox. Looks like you boys have got a winner in this one; better hang on to him!
 
1915 again - Orson Welles is born in a poor Colorado boarding house. Every July, peas grow there.
 
1919 - L. Frank Baum dies when a bucket of water is accidentally thrown on him.
 
1937 - The phrase "Oh, the humanity!" is uttered in complete seriousness for the final time.
 
1940 - John Steinbeck wins the Pulitzer Prize for his novel about corporate exploitation of the working class that apparently nobody has learned anything from in the last 80 years.
 
1960 - First televised Royal Wedding (of Liz II's sister Margaret). Over 20 million tune in, and the networks realize, "Shit, we've gotta have more of these."
 
1994 - The Channel Tunnel opens, physically linking the island of Great Britain to the mainland for the first time since the last ice age. "What's wrong with takin' the ferry? Or just paddlin' across like a dog?" ~ Paul Nuttall, UKIP
 
2001 - While visiting Syria, John Paul II is the first Pope to ever enter a mosque. In an interesting twist, neither he nor the mosque burst into flames.

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Catchin' up.
 
On May 7 in History:
 
558 - The dome of the Hagia Sophia collapses. "We'll see about this." ~ Justinian
 
973 - Death of Otto I, the first Holy Roman Emperor, unless you count Charlemagne, which you shouldn't, because reasons.
 
1794 - Disheartened by the atheistic tenets of the new Cult of Reason, French Revolutionary leader Robespierre decides to take literally his favorite Voltaire quote, "If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him," and creates the Cult of the Supreme Being.
 
1824 - In Vienna, Beethoven's Symphony no. 9 makes its world premier. From now on, calling something a person's "ninth symphony" no longer necessarily means it is the ninth one they've made, or even that it is a symphony.
 
1915 - A German U-boat sinks the RMS Lusitania, which was carrying several American passengers. They will come to regret this. The Germans, that is, not the passengers. They're already dead. Hence the regretting.
 
1919 - María Eva Duarte is born. Put her down for a lifetime of success. Give her credit; she'll find ways of paying.
 
1920 - The Soviet Russian Government "recognizes the independence" of the Democratic Republic of Georgia in the Treaty of Moscow.
 
1942 - In the Battle of the Coral Sea between U.S. and Japanese forces, for the first time ever in history, two fleets battle without ever once seeing each other. The spirits of the first two men to ever fight over a piece of meat look on and say to each other, "You think this might've got a bit out of hand?"
 
1946 - Tokyo Telecommunications Engineering is founded (you know it today as "Sony") by time travelers who know that Disney will one day need to be stopped.
 
1994 - After being stolen from the National Gallery of Norway in February, Edvard Munch's most famous painting, "The Scream", is recovered. Poor thing must have been terrified.
 
2000 - Vladimir Putin is elected president of Russia. Cheer up, lads, no one gets democracy right on their first try.
 

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On 5/6/2019 at 3:18 PM, Scotty said:

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle just had a boy today who's as yet unnamed and is 7th's in line to the throne, fingers crossed.

Archie, they named him Archie.

And Mark Hamill had this to say about their choice of middle name:

:D

 

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