This Day In History

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

17 December

497 BC – The first Saturnalia festival was celebrated in ancient Rome.  Masters served their slaves.  Gifts, usually small or humorous, were exchanged.  Public gambling was permitted.  And a sober person in Rome was the exception rather than the rule.

546 – Siege of Rome: The Ostrogoths under king Totila plunder the city, by bribing the Byzantine garrison.  If you underpay your guards while everyone they are supposed to be guarding is partying, some of them just might take that bribe.

1526 – Pope Clemens VII publishes degree Cum ad zero - forms Inquisition.  I didn't expect this.

1538 – Pope Paul Excommunicates Henry VIII of England.  Or as Mr VIII calls it, Tuesday.

1790 – The Aztec calendar stone is discovered at El Zócalo, Mexico City.  This is actually the second time Europeans have discovered the stone.  The first time it was buried next to the Cathedral hoping that people would forget it was there.  Later, American troops would use it for target practice.  So not particularly fond of preserving pre-Christian art in the New World?

1807 – Napoleonic Wars: France issues the Milan Decree, which confirms the Continental System.  France can't fight Britain, so instead it won't permit anyone in Europe to do business with Britain. This ends up hurting the rest of Europe a lot more than Britain, eventually leading to the rest of Europe rejecting Napoleon's authority.  So blockades and embargos may hurt you and your allies more than the intended target.  I'm sure politicians will bear this in mind well into the future.

1862 – American Civil War: General Ulysses S. Grant issues General Order No. 11, expelling Jews from parts of Tennessee, Mississippi, and Kentucky.  It seems the General may have overstepped his authority.

1865 – First performance of the Unfinished Symphony by Franz Schubert.  The elusive end to that Symphony would eventually be found.  

1903 – The Wright brothers make the first controlled powered, heavier-than-air flight in the Wright Flyer at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina.  And they still have not found my luggage.

1936 – Birth of Jorge Mario Bergoglio in Buenos Aires.  He earns a degree in Chemistry and loses half a lung before taking a job with a religious group.  Eventually, he is transferred to Rome where he works under the name Francis.

1957 – The United States successfully launches the first Atlas intercontinental ballistic missile at Cape Canaveral, Florida.  Cape Canaveral is on our side.  Usually, at least.  Why is the government launching ICBMs at it?

1969 – Project Blue Book: The United States Air Force closes its study of UFOs.  Out of over 12,000 investigations, only 701 (less than 6%) can not be explained.  And none of them suggest a level of science or technology unknown to the Air Force, or an extraterrestrial origin.  Of course, that is the OFFICIAL opinion...

1989 – The Simpsons first premieres on television with the episode "Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire".  George H W Bush was President. The Berlin Wall was down.  And Tracy Ulman was trying to convince anyone in television that her style of comedy could be accepted as funny without cartoon shorts between the sketches.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

18 December

218 BC – Second Punic War: Battle of the Trebia: Hannibal's Carthaginian forces defeat those of the Roman Republic.  Yes, the defeat was quite humiliating for Rome.  However, Hannibal did not defeat all of Rome's legions, capture or destroy the city of Rome, or establish a colony for Carthage in Italy.  Rome will not make the same mistakes when they go to Carthage in the future.

1271 – Kublai Khan renames his empire "Yuan" (元 yuán), officially marking the start of the Yuan dynasty of Mongolia and China.  And I thought Kublai Khan ruled a place called Xanadu.  Is it possible that the drug fevered dreams of English romantic poets shouldn't be my primary source for history?

1655 – The Whitehall Conference ends with the determination that there was no law preventing Jews from re-entering England after the Edict of Expulsion of 1290.  For future reference, if you tell someone to leave you also need to tell them to not return.

1833 – The national anthem of the Russian Empire, "God Save the Tsar!", is first performed.  Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky would quote this work to represent the struggle of the Russian defenders of Moscow in the 1812 Overture, even though this anthem was written twenty one years after that battle.  Keep a few of those cannons loaded and pointed at the critics.  No one will complain.   

1892 – Premiere performance of The Nutcracker  (Щелкунчик, Балет-феерия) in Saint Petersburg, Russia.  Score by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky.  Choreographed by Marius Petipa and Lev Ivanov.  The libretto was adapted from a story by Alexandre Dumas, which itself was adapted from a story by E. T. A. Hoffmann.  This performance was not well received.  This ballet and its score would forever be an obscure footnote.

1917 – The resolution containing the language of the Eighteenth Amendment to enact Prohibition is passed by the United States Congress.  Certainly nothing could go wrong with this.

1966 – Dr. Seuss' "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" airs for 1st time on CBS.  This was narrated by Boris Karloff in one of the best performances of his later years.  Thurl Ravenscroft singing "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" remained uncredited, even though his performance was gr-r-reat!

[ChronosCat 155]

22 hours ago, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

1790 – The Aztec calendar stone is discovered at El Zócalo, Mexico City.  This is actually the second time Europeans have discovered the stone.  The first time it was buried next to the Cathedral hoping that people would forget it was there.  Later, American troops would use it for target practice.  So not particularly fond of preserving pre-Christian art in the New World?

We can't just leave evidence lying around that the "savages" had (or worse have) their own civilizations, now can we?

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

19 December

1686 – According to Daniel Defoe, this was the date Robinson Crusoe left his island after 28 years.  Because everyone wants to leave the tropics and return to Britain in December.

1732 – Benjamin Franklin under the name Richard Saunders begins publication of "Poor Richard's Almanack".  As the publisher, Franklin can take all the credit if the people like the almanack.  And if it is not well received, he can blame the whole thing on "Poor Richard".

1776 – Although the exact date is disputed, around this time Thomas Paine publishes his first "American Crisis" essay beginning "These are the times that try men's souls".  If he's writing about time, couldn't he be a little more specific about the date?

1777 – American Revolutionary War: George Washington's Continental Army goes into winter quarters at Valley Forge, Pennsylvania.  A forge is hot.  Right?  This should be a nice warm place for the Army to spend the winter.

1842 – US recognizes independence of Hawaii.  This does not necessarily mean that the US would always regard Hawaii as independent.

1843 – God bless us, every one!  "A Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens is published, but only 6,000 copies are sold.  Bah, humbug! 

1932 – London Calling.  The BBC Empire Service, today the BBC World Service, begins broadcasting.  Before we continue, please listen to some personal messages.  Jean has a long moustache.  The kennel is cold.  Ivy eats little lambs.  Little sister is lost in the woods.  Don't buy the liverwurst.  Brother John are you sleeping?  The Pharaoh is in denial.

1972 – Apollo program: The last manned lunar flight, Apollo 17, crewed by Eugene Cernan, Ronald Evans, and Harrison Schmitt, returns to Earth.  Are those annoying astronauts gone?  Life can get back to normal for the Moon Men.

1983 – The original FIFA World Cup trophy, the Jules Rimet Trophy, is stolen from the headquarters of the Brazilian Football Confederation in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.  A little less than eight kilograms of gold plated sterling silver on a lapis lazuli base.  The scrap value of the trophy is sure to offset the risk of what would happen to the thieves if they were ever caught by angry soccer fans.

1984 – The Sino-British Joint Declaration, stating that China would resume the exercise of sovereignty over Hong Kong and the United Kingdom would restore Hong Kong to China with effect from July 1, 1997 is signed in Beijing, China by Deng Xiaoping and Margaret Thatcher.  By the end of the Twentieth Century, Britain had accepted that their dominions and colonies might become independent nations.  But the thought of turning over a British colony to another country just isn't Cricket.

Edited December 19, 2018 by Pharaoh RutinTutin
Spelling

[Illjwamh 98]

On December 20 in History:

69 - The Roman Senate officially recognizes Vespasian as emperor, bringing an end to the Year of the Four Emperors. There will never be anything this chaotic and ridiculous again.

1192 - Leopold V of Austria captures Richard the Lionheart on his way home from the Crusades, in part because Richard threw his flag down one time. Excommunication is a small price to pay for such sweet revenge!

1606 - The Virginia Company sends three ships full of people to establish a colony in North America that they can name after the king. No on is allowed to mention the word "Roanoke" for the entire journey.

1860 - "Screw you guys, I'm going home." ~South Carolina

1924 - A fully rehabilitated Adolf Hitler is released from prison.

1946 - It's A Wonderful Life premiers to mixed reviews, box office failure, and accusations of supporting communism. Just another footnote in film history.

1971 - The French doctor Bernard Kouchner founds Doctors Without Borders along with a group of journalists. First order of business: recruit some more actual doctors.

1996 - The bundle of stardust that is Carl Sagan ceases all self-sustaining chemical processes.

1999 - Portugal returns Macau to China after 442 years. Think about that the next time your neighbor is late returning something they borrowed.

[CritterKeeper 1,102]

On 12/12/2018 at 11:57 PM, Don Edwards said:

Or by reading (or trying to read - it's quite long) the Romance of the Three Kingdoms. Don't let the title fool you, it isn't a romance. In fact everyone of importance in the first sixth of the book is dead by the end.

Didn't know George R. R. Martin did that one.

On 12/9/2018 at 7:38 PM, The Old Hack said:

To be fair, E. coli almost made me extinct.

To be fair, youv'e had billions of E. coli inhabiting your intestines since you were at most 40 hours old, making vitamin K2 and preventing your gut being colonized by pathogenic bacteria.  Just about every warm-blooded organism with a gut has E. coli in its normal flora.  Some strains are even used as probiotics to treat IBD.  The vast majority of them are beneficial, it's only a few bad apples that give the rest of them a bad name.

On 12/10/2018 at 2:01 PM, Illjwamh said:

On December 10 in History:

220 - The Han dynasty finally comes to an end after more than 400 years with the abdication of Emperor Xian. But does it really? The Chinese people, writing system, ethnicity, and national identity still take their names from it. Lol, imagine if we still called ourselves Romans and named stuff in Latin.

Or perhaps imagine the English language, Arabic numbers, and metric system still being used in another few centuries.

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1317 - King Birger of Sweden invites his brothers, dukes Valdemar and Eric, to a Christmas banquet. It is meant as reconciliation for the brothers' coup attempt several years prior. The dukes' retinues are put up in the nearby town of Nyköping due to space concerns. This allows the king to easily arrest his brothers and throw them in a dungeon where they will later starve, then easily round up their men. The more you learn about history, the more you start to think George R.R. Martin is just lazy.

He's long stated that his main inspiration is England's War of the Roses.  And I'm a little surprised you didn't fit in a Birger King joke there...too easy?

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1868 - The world's first traffic light is installed outside the Palace of Westminster. Using semaphore arms and illuminated at night by red and green gas lamps, it is perhaps most impressive in that the first car will not exist for another 17 years.

Who needs cars?  Humans are perfectly capable of snarling up traffic and running over pedestrians in horse-drawn vehicles.

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1936 - Edward VIII officially signs away his claim to the British throne in order to marry Wallis Simpson. The power of boners is strong.

If it was just boners, he could have done like so many other kings and elected leaders, and just kept her as a mistress.  Instead he gave up not only his throne, but his country and most hope of any sort of cordial relationship with his own mother.  They were happily married until his death in 1972, and he got Queen Liz to agree to let them be buried side by side in the Royal Burial Ground under threat of having bought plots in Baltimore if the family kept snubbing his beloved after death.

On the other hand, Edward made a habit of having affairs with a series of married women before settling with Wallis, he shirked his duties and was careless with confidential information, and he was much friendlier with Hitler and would almost certainly have been in favor of appeasement to or even alliance with the Nazis.  So it was probably a good thing he abdicated.

On 12/11/2018 at 1:53 AM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

One point that bears stating is that the various Dominions must now agree on matters of royal succession. But how often would that question arise?

One wonders what would have happened if one or more of the Dominions had refused to consent to his abdication.

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Also, in 2003, the UN General Assembly declared 11 December to be International Mountain Day.  So give mountains to all your friends and relatives.

I think this SATW is more on point....  https://satwcomic.com/the-joy-of-giving

On 12/14/2018 at 9:25 AM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

14 December

557 – Constantinople is severely damaged by a 6.4 magnitude earthquake.  This is clearly divine retribution towards humans daring to inhabit a geologically unstable planet.

One wonders how they're able to assign it such a precise number on a scale not published until 1,378 years later.

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1542 – Princess Mary Stuart becomes Queen of Scots at the age of only one week on the death of her father, James V of Scotland.  Would a six day old girl truly be any worse than {Insert any world leader}?

They say she was born prematurely (but healthy).  How would history have been different if she'd been born two weeks later?

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1782 – A good day to be French.  The Montgolfier brothers first test fly an unmanned hot air balloon in France; it floats nearly 2 km (1.2 mi).

They didn't plan for it to go so far -- the lift was stronger than they expected and they lost control of it.

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1918 – The 1918 United Kingdom general election occurred, the first where women were permitted to vote.  It turns out that women and men are equally capable of choosing the wrong candidates.

There was no law against women voting until 1832.  Some women continued to appear on the voters' rolls throughout the time they were fighting for broader voting rights, usually women who were very wealthy property owners, and not all men were allowed to vote back then, either.  There were about a million women who voted in municiple elections in England in 1900.  Women were fighting for and winning the right to own their own property while married, and to break free of gender roles.  Men's right to vote was based on their owning property, their wealth, and/or their occupation, so when the war led to women taking on the jobs men were vacating to go to war, they started qualifying on those grounds in greater and greater numbers.  And when they "won the right to vote" that only applied to women over the age of thirty (men had a much lower cutoff) who were property owners, wives of property owners, or university graduates.

One reason for the restrictions was that, with so many men dying in the war, if they had let women have equal right to vote as men, the women voters would have been in the majority by a significant margin!

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1958 – The 3rd Soviet Antarctic Expedition becomes the first to reach the southern pole of inaccessibility.  But if they reached it, doesn't that mean that it is actually accessible?

Huh, had to look that one up.  Never had an urge to visit South Dakota before.

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2017 – The Walt Disney Company announces that it would acquire 21st Century Fox, including the 20th Century Fox movie studio, for $52.4 billion.
Who's the leader of the club that now owns you and me?
M-I-C- -K-E-Y- -M-O-U-S-E!

On 12/16/2018 at 2:03 AM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

16 December

1811 – The first two in a series of four severe earthquakes occur in the vicinity of New Madrid, Missouri. 

The strongest quakes in New Madrid were reportedly enough to make church bells ring in Boston.

Can't find a recording of this one, which is a pity, but here's some lyrics.

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1937 – Theodore Cole and Ralph Roe attempt to escape from the American federal prison on Alcatraz Island in San Francisco Bay; neither is ever seen again.  According to prison officials, they died.  According to popular legend, they escaped. 

The Mythbusters did an especially good episode on this one, recreating the raft the prisoners would have used and making their own trip.  They showed that not only could the escapees have made it to shore, but where they would have eneded up, and that if they then set their equipment adrift it would have ended up exactly where it was found in real life.

On 12/17/2018 at 0:10 PM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

17 December

497 BC – The first Saturnalia festival was celebrated in ancient Rome.  Masters served their slaves.  Gifts, usually small or humorous, were exchanged. 

Sounds like a fun holiday!

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1903 – The Wright brothers make the first controlled powered, heavier-than-air flight in the Wright Flyer at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. 

Lasting all of 12 seconds and traveling a whopping 120 feet.  How far we've come!

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1989 – The Simpsons first premieres on television with the episode "Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire".  George H W Bush was President. The Berlin Wall was down.  And Tracy Ulman was trying to convince anyone in television that her style of comedy could be accepted as funny without cartoon shorts between the sketches.

I remember when the Simpsons were nothing but the bumpers around commercial breaks on The Tracy Ulman Show!  Who knew they'd turn a few seconds of badly drawn family strife into a phenomenon?

On 12/19/2018 at 4:19 AM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

19 December

1932 – London Calling.  The BBC Empire Service, today the BBC World Service, begins broadcasting.  Before we continue, please listen to some personal messages.  Jean has a long moustache.  The kennel is cold.  Ivy eats little lambs.  Little sister is lost in the woods.  Don't buy the liverwurst.  Brother John are you sleeping?  The Pharaoh is in denial.

Little lambs eat ivy.  Shari Lewis eats a little lamb, just to see peoples' reactions.  ;-)

Actually, no one should eat ivy, it has saponins and falcarinol and is quite toxic.

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1972 – Apollo program: The last manned lunar flight, Apollo 17, crewed by Eugene Cernan, Ronald Evans, and Harrison Schmitt, returns to Earth. 

I wonder which of them was the last to leave?  Imagine holding the record for being the last human to be on the Moon...for 46 years and counting.

[ijuin 572]

41 minutes ago, CritterKeeper said:

I wonder which of them was the last to leave?  Imagine holding the record for being the last human to be on the Moon...for 46 years and counting.

The Lunar Module was set up so that the Commander's duty station was nearest the exit. Since it was not practical for the co-pilot to climb past him while they were wearing the bulky life support backpacks in the cramped cabin, this meant that the Commander was first to exit and last to enter. That makes Cernan, the Commander of Apollo 17, the last human to have set foot on the Moon to date.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

21 December

1582 - Ever get so frustrated with Christmas that you want to skip it?  Flanders adopts Gregorian calendar, tomorrow is Jan 1 1583

1849 - First US skating club formed in Philadelphia.  The club used against Nancy Kerrigan was in Detroit.

1866 - Fetterman Massacre: Lakota, Cheyenne, and Arapaho Indians kill all 81 US Army soldiers in the worst military disaster ever suffered by the U.S. Army on the Great Plains.  Never heard of this battle?  Well, about ten years later, a bigger "worst military disaster" would be led by George Armstrong Custer.

1872 - According to Jules Verne, this is when Phileas Fogg completed his round the world trip in 80 days, in "Around the World in Eighty Days".

1891 - First game of basketball, based on rules created by James Naismith, played by 18 students in Springfield, Massachusetts.  No dribbling, dunking, three-pointers, shot clock, or players of color.

1913 – Arthur Wynne's "word-cross", the first crossword puzzle, is published in the New York World.  Thirty two clues leading to a world wide obsession.

1914 – First feature-length silent film comedy "Tillie's Punctured Romance" released starring Marie Dressler, Mabel Normand and Charlie Chaplin.  Comedy in movies?  This will never catch on.

1933 – Fox Films signs Shirley Temple aged 5, to a studio contract.  Pretty girls in movies?  This will never catch on.

1937 – Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, the world's first full-length animated feature, premieres at the Carthay Circle Theatre.  Animation in movies?  This will never catch on.

1968 – Apollo program: Apollo 8 is launched from the Kennedy Space Center, placing its crew on a lunar trajectory for the first visit to another celestial body by humans.  Bear in mind that the most famous image of the mission, Earthrise, was an illusion.  A result of the spacecraft being in motion around the Moon.  From the Lunar surface, the Earth appears to remain at the same point in the sky at all times.

1970 – Elvis Presley meets US President Richard Nixon in the White House - the image of this meeting is the most requested photo from the entire National Archives.  Prominent figures of the 50s who faded somewhat but came back in the 60s only to become national embarrassments in the 70s.

21 December is normally the Winter Solstice in the Northern Hemisphere.
It is the longest night of the year in the Northern Hemisphere, south of the Arctic Circle.
It is the traditional feast day of St Thomas The Apostle, aka Thomas the Doubter.
Combining the long night with the remembrance of the Apostle who doubted the Resurrection, some Christian congregations observe the night of 21 December as "Blue Christmas".  A service, not for the departed, but for those who have lost someone in the previous year.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

22 December

1807 – The Embargo Act, forbidding trade with all foreign countries, is passed by the U.S. Congress, at the urging of President Thomas Jefferson.  France and Britain are fighting.  Again.  So to make sure the US doesn't look like we are taking sides, Jefferson declares that we won't trade with anyone.  This will certainly hurt France and Britain far more than it hurts America.

1808 – Ludwig van Beethoven conducts and performs in concert at the Theater an der Wien, Vienna, with the premiere of his Fifth Symphony, Sixth Symphony, Fourth Piano Concerto (performed by Beethoven himself) and Choral Fantasy (with Beethoven at the piano).  The only thing missing was Lucy fawning over Schroder at his toy piano and Chuck Berry  performing Roll Over Beethoven.

1891 – Asteroid 323 Brucia becomes the first asteroid discovered using photography.  I KNEW those Asteroids were taking pictures of us.  And they tried to tell me only humans could use photography.

1910 – US postal savings stamps 1st issued.  That's right, the big banks effectively refused to accommodate small savers and investors, so individuals putting away money a little at a time had to deal with very small banks, or the Post Office.  And a lot of Americans preferred the Post Office.

1932 – "The Mummy" directed by Karl Freund and starring Boris Karloff is released in the US - 1st Mummy horror film.  A cinematic masterpiece and a perennial family favourite.

1942 – World War II: Adolf Hitler signs the order to develop the V-2 rocket as a weapon.
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjDEsGZLbio

1944 – World War II: Battle of the Bulge: German troops demand the surrender of United States troops at Bastogne, Belgium, prompting the famous one word reply by General Anthony McAuliffe: "Nuts!"  A speech that will live forever in the history of American rhetoric.  Right along side Lincoln at Gettysburg, FDR's "Fear Itself",  and Clinton's "It depends on what your definition of 'Is' is."

1958 – "Chipmunk Song" reaches #1.  So is this what happens when you give a songwriting comedian a variable speed tape player?

[Illjwamh 98]

Happy Festivus for the rest of us!

On December 23 in History:

583 - Yohl Ik'nal becomes queen of Palenque. No word on whether she has to pretend to be a dude to do it. Either the Mayans are more progressive than that, or they are properly ashamed and remove any evidence from the written record.

679 - King Dagobert II is killed in a hunting "accident". And by accident, I mean murder. Prince Catobert is questioned, but no charges are filed.

1688 - James II of England gloriously runs away to France.

1783 - George Washington resigns as Commander-in-Chief of the Continental Army. "Not so fast!" say the framers of the U.S. Constitution.

1919 - The United Kingdom officially recognizes women as people.

1954 - First successful kidney transplant. Ominously unknown: number of unsuccessful prior attempts.

1970 - The North Tower of the World Trade Center in New York City becomes the tallest building in the world. "Not so fast!" say the builders of the Sears (later Willis) Tower in Chicago. Jesus, what did you think I was going to say?

2002 - Finn Wolfhard is born, making him chronologically 30 years younger than every character he will ever portray.

[Illjwamh 98]

On Christmas Eve in History:

820 - A group of conspirators dressed as monks enter the palace chapel to assassinate Byzantine emperor Leo V. At first they kill the priest by mistake, giving Leo enough time to snatch a big cross from the altar to defend himself. Cannot make this stuff up. To be continued tomorrow...

1166 - Prince John of England is born. The fourth son of Henry II, he is unlikely to ever be king, or do anything significant whatsoever.

1737 - Armies of the Maratha Empire defeat the combined forces of the Mughal Empire, Jaipur, Hyderabad, Awadh, and Bengal at the Battle of Bhopal. Bring it OOOONNNNNN!

1777 - James Cook discovers an island. Because he's running out of things to call his discoveries, he just names it Christmas Island because that's when he found it. We know it today as Kiritimati, which is the natives' closest approximate pronunciation of the holiday.

1800 - The Machine infernale plot, a conspiracy to assassinate Napoleon Bonaparte with a wine cart filled with gunpowder, fails when the dude whose ONE JOB was to signal when Napoleon was coming freaks out and doesn't do that. The explosion is late and kills some civilians, along with the innocent girl they'd asked to hold the carthorse's reins for them..

1814 - The Treaty of Ghent ends the War of 1812, only six months of which actually took place in 1812, and which will continue for another two months into 1815. Whatever.

1913 - 73 people die in Calumet, Michigan when somebody falsely yells "Fire!" in a crowded theatre, in case you ever wondered why people are always saying you can't do that.

1946 - Jeff Sessions is the unholy offspring of a Keebler Elf and a pile of wood chippings wrapped in a Confederate flag.

1951 - Libya becomes independent of Italy, and Idris I becomes king, beginning what will surely be a long and prolific dynasty.

1968 - The crew of Apollo 8 become the first humans to visit the moon. The freaking MOON. I cannot overstate the magnitude of this achievement, especially considering they probably spent less time planning for the trip than my mother does when she goes to Hawaii.

1980 - Death of Karl Dönitz, notable for being the only Führer of Germany NOT to order the extermination of all Jews, and for being the only head of state in history to be convicted by an international tribunal until 2012.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

Pretty good.

But you missed some important events over the last two days.

On ‎12‎/‎23‎/‎2018 at 0:56 PM, Illjwamh said:

On December 23 in History:

1966 - A displaced Pharaoh reestablishes his royal presence in rural Michigan.  He would later relocate to Florida where the Manatees greet his reign with respectful indifference.

10 minutes ago, Illjwamh said:

On Christmas Eve in History:

1818 - A flood had damaged the organ of the St. Nikola parish church in Oberndorf bei Salzburg in Austria.  Father Joseph Mohr, a young priest, gave a poem he wrote to a local schoolmaster and organist, Franz Xaver Gruber.  Mohr asked Herr Gruber to arrange it for guitar...  OK, if you aren't already familiar with this story you probably aren't interested in Christmas Music in general.  This particular tale is told only slightly less often than the one about what happened when Quirinius was governor of Syria.  Suffice to say that "Stille Nacht, Heilige Nacht" (in English "Silent Night") was performed publicly for the first time two hundred years ago today.

[Illjwamh 98]

On Dec. 25 in History:

333 - Constantine the Great raises his youngest son Constans to the rank of Caesar, a.k.a. "Practice Emperor".

336 - Romans celebrate Saturnalia like they always do, but for PR reasons they call it "Christmas" now.

496 - Clovis I of the Franks gets his head dunked into some water and changes the course of the entire Western Hemisphere for thousands of years to come.

597 - Augustine of Canterbury (and some other guys) baptize somewhere in the vicinity of 10,000 Anglo-Saxons in Kent. Quoth the Anglo-Saxon king: "There will be a pipeline."

~ INTERIM LIGHTING ROUND! CORONATIONS~
(CUE BENNY HILL THEME)

800 - Charlemagne - Holy Roman Emperor (Whose successors will never hold Rome)

820 - Michael II - Eastern Roman Emperor (wait for it...)

1025 - Mieszko II of Poland (try to pronounce it; I'll wait)

1066 - William of England (who took with it a nice upgrade from "Bastard" to "Conqueror")

1076 - Bolesław II of Poland (goes great with sloppy joes)

1100 - Baldwin I of Jerusalem (his line would continue uncontested forever)

1130 - Roger II of Sicily (who, despite what you might think, is the FIRST king of Sicily)

~LIGHTNING ROUND OVER~

820 - Emperor Leo V is assassinated in a church by a bunch of assassins disguised as monks. His successor, Michael II (who hired them), was imprisoned in the basement, but they couldn't get him out because the key was on the person of the recently deceased emperor, whose dismembered body they had unceremoniously tossed out into the snow. He was thus crowned while still clad in irons.There was no need for me to add any embellishments on this one.

1261 - Carrying on the tradition of his namesake, Michael VIII has his co-ruler John IV deposed - and blinded for good measure. It's Christmas in Byzantium!

1776 - George Washington leads a surprise assault on a camp full of hungover Germans. This is re-enacted every year with employees at the return desk unwillingly playing the part of the Germans.

1868 - In an unpopular move, President Andrew Johnson recognizes that it would be impractical and detrimental to society to try the entire workforce of half the country's land area for treason.

1914 - Across the Western Front of World War I, a number of truces break out as impromptu football (soccer) matches spring up. The carnage that ensues from the riots that arise among the spectators is so horrible that this is not repeated for the remainder of the war.

1935 - Regina Jonas is ordained as the first female rabbi in history. This is heavily criticized by some for being "Completely unorthodox!"

1950 - Feeling that their Scottish identity is being eroded away by the union with England, a group of university students orchestrate an elaborate and ultimately successful heist to steal a rock.

2009 - Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab attempts to launch a terrorist suicide attack over the city of Detroit. Despite thorough planning, he succeeds only in lighting his nuts on fire.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

26 December

Boxing Day!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKQioyQDowU

1492 – With the flagship of his fleet having run aground on a sand bank and damaged beyond repair the previous day, the first Spanish settlement in the New World, La Navidad (modern Môle-Saint-Nicolas) in Haiti, is founded by Christopher Columbus.

1776 – American Revolutionary War: In the Battle of Trenton, the Continental Army attacks and successfully defeats a garrison of Hessian forces.  General Washington trusts you had a Merry Christmas and hopes you will be comfortable as war prisoners in the New Year.

1790 – Louis XVI of France gives his public assent to Civil Constitution of the Clergy during the French Revolution.  Because forcing the Clergy to swear loyalty to the State above the Church will certainly stop the revolutionary forces trying to destroy the Royalty...

1792 – Trial of French King Louis XVI.  The court hears the kings defense brought by Raymond Desèze.  Ok, new plan Monsieur XVI.  Sit down and shut up.  There is obviously nothing you can do at this point to sway the forces at the head of the revolution.  And you can probably guess what the forces of the revolution will do to your head.

1860 – The first ever inter-club English association football match takes place between Hallam F.C. and Sheffield F.C. at Sandygate Road ground in Sheffield, England.  So instead of competing against the other players with whom we practice every day, we can put a team of our best players up against a team of the best players from other clubs?

1861 – American Civil War: The Trent Affair: Confederate diplomatic envoys James Murray Mason and John Slidell are freed by the United States government, thus heading off a possible war between the United States and the United Kingdom.  Don't even try out bully Britain on matters of diplomacy.

1862 – Four nuns serving as volunteer nurses on board USS Red Rover are the first female nurses on a U.S. Navy hospital ship.  Four women working on a Naval vessel and it didn't sink immediately?  We may need to rethink long established Naval doctrine.

1871 – Gilbert and Sullivan collaborate for the first time, on their lost opera, Thespis. It does modestly well, but the two would not collaborate again for four years.  No worries, they will eventually bring us that infernal nonsense, "Pinafore".

1898 – Marie and Pierre Curie announce the isolation of radium.  Too bad it took them longer to realize the need to keep radioactive materials isolated.

1919 – The contract for Babe Ruth of the Boston Red Sox is sold to the New York Yankees by owner Harry Frazee, allegedly establishing the Curse of the Bambino superstition.  The "superstition" seems to suggest that if you give up the rights to the best player in the game, you deserve to lose.

1941 – U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt signs a bill establishing the fourth Thursday in November as Thanksgiving Day in the United States.  Although some states would insist on observing the last Thursday of November as Thanksgiving for some time afterward.  Texas in 1956 would be the last state to observe Thanksgiving on a date different than the rest of the US government.

1963 – The Beatles' "I Want to Hold Your Hand" and "I Saw Her Standing There" are released in the United States, marking the beginning of Beatlemania on an international level.  Human civilization has come to an end.

Also, 26 December is the Feast of St Stephen.  The date which in 1853, English hymnwriter John Mason Neale would set an apocryphal tale about a Bohemian Duke to a 13th century Nordic Spring-Carol, "Tempus Adest Floridum" ("The time is near for flowering").  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zv8PgukSLX0  Like St Stephen, Neale may have been stoned.

[CritterKeeper 1,102]

On 12/22/2018 at 8:14 AM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

22 December

1910 – US postal savings stamps 1st issued.  That's right, the big banks effectively refused to accommodate small savers and investors, so individuals putting away money a little at a time had to deal with very small banks, or the Post Office.  And a lot of Americans preferred the Post Office.

Cool, another piece of almost-forgotten history!  Personally, I kinda wish this were still an option for those who can only save a little at a time.

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1932 – "The Mummy" directed by Karl Freund and starring Boris Karloff is released in the US - 1st Mummy horror film.  A cinematic masterpiece and a perennial family favourite.

I took a class in undergrad called "Novel Archaeology" which was all about archaeology as seen through the eyes of pop culture, mostly books but it also covered some films, including this one.  You can get a good sense of the attitudes towards antiquities and the natives who might have laid claim to them, by watching this film.

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1958 – "Chipmunk Song" reaches #1.  So is this what happens when you give a songwriting comedian a variable speed tape player?

Ooo eee ooo aah aah, ting tang walla-walla bing bang!

On 12/23/2018 at 11:56 AM, Illjwamh said:

679 - King Dagobert II

The result of Dogbert going to Dagobah?

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1954 - First successful kidney transplant. Ominously unknown: number of unsuccessful prior attempts.

I'm sure they happened, and they have my undying gratitude for everything that was learned that eventually led to still having my sister with us almost twenty-five years after her successful one!

On 12/24/2018 at 1:34 PM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

1966 - A displaced Pharaoh reestablishes his royal presence in rural Michigan.  He would later relocate to Florida where the Manatees greet his reign with respectful indifference.

Happy belated birthday!

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1818 - A flood had damaged the organ of the St. Nikola parish church in Oberndorf bei Salzburg in Austria.  Father Joseph Mohr, a young priest, gave a poem he wrote to a local schoolmaster and organist, Franz Xaver Gruber.  Mohr asked Herr Gruber to arrange it for guitar...  OK, if you aren't already familiar with this story you probably aren't interested in Christmas Music in general.  This particular tale is told only slightly less often than the one about what happened when Quirinius was governor of Syria.  Suffice to say that "Stille Nacht, Heilige Nacht" (in English "Silent Night") was performed publicly for the first time two hundred years ago today.

The next they sang was Stille Nacht,

"'Tis 'Silent Night'!" said I,

And in two tongues one song filled up the sky!"

   - "Christmas in the Trenches" by John McCutcheon

On 12/25/2018 at 9:39 PM, Illjwamh said:

~ INTERIM LIGHTING ROUND! CORONATIONS~
(CUE BENNY HILL THEME)

"Yakkity Sax" deployed!

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820 - Emperor Leo V is assassinated in a church by a bunch of assassins disguised as monks. His successor, Michael II (who hired them), was imprisoned in the basement, but they couldn't get him out because the key was on the person of the recently deceased emperor, whose dismembered body they had unceremoniously tossed out into the snow. He was thus crowned while still clad in irons.There was no need for me to add any embellishments on this one.

My compliments to the blacksmith for forging such durable, difficult to escape even with help, manacles!

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1868 - In an unpopular move, President Andrew Johnson recognizes that it would be impractical and detrimental to society to try the entire workforce of half the country's land area for treason.

They had already extended amnesty on condition of swearing loyalty to the United States, albeit with a number of exceptions that mainly covered ranking officers, higher-ups in Confederate government, and people who had deliberately left the government or military of the United States in order to go join the Confederacy.  In an unusual inversion of "treat officers in a gentlemanly manner but screw the little guy," one of the categories exempt from amnesty had been anyone with property exceeding $20,000.  So, it was hardly the entire workforce at stake, more like the rich and influential, plus those among the workforce who refused to promise not to do it again.  I suspect that's why it may not have been popular, because it may have been seen as letting ringleaders off scot-free.

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1914 - Across the Western Front of World War I, a number of truces break out as impromptu football (soccer) matches spring up. The carnage that ensues from the riots that arise among the spectators is so horrible that this is not repeated for the remainder of the war.

 

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

27 December

537 – The construction of the Hagia Sophia in Constantinople is completed.  One of the largest buildings in the world, and largest Cathedral for almost one thousand years, its eventual pillage and conversion at the hands of Latin and Islamic conquerors was practically assured.

1814 – Destruction of schooner Carolina, the last of Commodore Daniel Patterson's make-shift fleet that fought a series of delaying actions that contributed to Andrew Jackson's victory at the Battle of New Orleans.  The delaying actions were so effective that Jackson's victory occurred after the war was already over.

1831 – The HMS Beagle departs England for a survey of South America.  On board was a young Naturalist, Charles Darwin. He might get a few papers based on this trip published.

1845 – Journalist John L. O'Sullivan, writing in his newspaper the New York Morning News, argues that the United States had the right to claim the entire Oregon Country "by the right of our manifest destiny".  It's in the newspapers so it must be true.

1922 – Japanese aircraft carrier Hōshō becomes the first purpose built aircraft carrier to be commissioned in the world.  Airplanes on boats?  The only real measure of Naval power is artillery on battleships.  This is a mere novelty.

1927 – Kern and Hammerstein's musical play Show Boat, considered to be the first true American musical play, opens at the Ziegfeld Theatre on Broadway.  So it's a play?  And it has singing and dancing?  But it's not an opera?  

1929 – Soviet General Secretary Joseph Stalin orders the "liquidation of the kulaks as a class".  Because nothing will get the poorest of the peasants on the side of the revolution like humiliating and destroying the slightly wealthier peasants.

1947 – First "Howdy Doody Show" (Puppet Playhouse), telecast on NBC.  The beginning of American culture.

1979 – The Soviet Union invades the Democratic Republic of Afghanistan.  The United States strongly objects... This will not end well.  Or should I say well, this will not end.

1983 – Pope John Paul II visits Mehmet Ali Ağca in Rebibbia's prison and personally forgives him for the 1981 attack on him in St. Peter's Square.  How many Hail Mary's did that take?

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

28 December

169 BC – The Menorah is lit to rededicate the Holy Temple of Jerusalem after two centuries of foreign rule and religious oppression and a seven-year revolt. The Menorah burns for eight days without the sufficient fuel needed to do so, birthing the holiday Hanukkah.  Thank You Judas Maccabeus.  Oy, if he could only see us...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LslsgH3-UFU

1065 – Westminster Abbey is consecrated in England.  The first coronation would be celebrated there less than a year later.  Too bad the King getting crowned would not be related to the King who had the place built.

1832 – John C. Calhoun becomes the first Vice President of the United States to resign.  Can we teach other politicians how to do that?

1849 – M Jolly-Bellin discovers dry-cleaning.  He accidentally upsets a lamp containing turpentine & oil on his clothing then sees a cleaning effect.  Someone had to put the "DRY" into LAUNDRY.

1867 – United States claims Midway Atoll, the first territory annexed outside Continental limits.  Manifest Destiny was supposed to justify expanding from Sea to Shining Sea.  What is the explanation for taking something half way across said shining sea?

1895 – Wilhelm Röntgen publishes a paper detailing his discovery of a new type of radiation, which later will be known as x-rays.  This was such a publicity stunt.  If you looked closely you could see right through it.

1922 – Birth of Stan Lee, American publisher, producer, and actor.  Just once more, everyone.  EXCELSIOR!

1934 – The film "Bright Eyes" premieres starring Shirley Temple and featuring the song "On the Good Ship Lollipop".  I have not yet found an online travel service that will book passage for me on that ship.

1973 – The Endangered Species Act is passed in the United States.  Uryuoms are not listed as a protected species...

2008 – The Detroit Lions crash in a 31-21 loss to Green Bay Packers at Lambeau Field; first team in NFL history to go winless in a 16-game season.  Of all the records the Lions could have set, it had to be THIS one.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

29 December

1170 – Thomas Becket, Archbishop of Canterbury, is assassinated inside Canterbury Cathedral by followers of King Henry II; he subsequently becomes a saint and martyr in the Anglican Communion and the Catholic Church.  The King had Becket appointed as Archbishop because the King thought Thomas Becket was his friend and would do as the King wished.  Upon becoming Archbishop, Thomas Becket committed the unforgivable sin of thinking for himself.

1812 – USS Constitution, under the command of Captain William Bainbridge, captures HMS Java off the coast of Brazil after a three-hour battle.  If the Captain says he's going out for Java, it may not be just a coffee break.

1835 – The Treaty of New Echota is signed, ceding all the lands of the Cherokee east of the Mississippi River to the United States.  And what were the Cherokee promised in return?  It really doesn't matter.

1851 – The first American YMCA opens in Boston, Massachusetts.  Young man, there's a place you can go (in Boston) / I said, young man, when you're short on your dough / You can stay there, and I'm sure you will find / Many ways to have a good time

1860 – The launch of HMS Warrior, with her combination of screw propeller, iron hull and iron armour, renders all previous warships obsolete.  Almost all.  Bushnell's Turtle remained jus as effective as it ever was.

1997 – Hong Kong begins to kill all the city's 1.25 million chickens to stop the spread of a potentially deadly influenza strain.  This much killing sounds like a military operation.  Is General Tso still on active duty?  If not, they may need to reactivate Colonel Sanders.

2003 – Maria Sergina, the last known speaker of Akkala Sami dies, rendering the language extinct.  Her last words were... a complete mystery.  No one else was left who knew what she was saying.

2006 – UK settles its Anglo-American loan, post-WWII loan debt.  Wait a minute.  Nations can actually settle their national debts?  Do you think this idea might catch on?

2016 – US President Barack Obama retaliates against Russia for hacking American computer systems and trying to influence the 2016 presidential election by ejecting 35 Russian spies and imposing sanctions.  These sanctions would be lifted about a month later.

[CritterKeeper 1,102]

On 12/28/2018 at 0:31 AM, Pharaoh RutinTutin said:

1867 – United States claims Midway Atoll, the first territory annexed outside Continental limits.  Manifest Destiny was supposed to justify expanding from Sea to Shining Sea.  What is the explanation for taking something half way across said shining sea?

"We need the guano."

No, seriously.

Quote

1973 – The Endangered Species Act is passed in the United States.  Uryuoms are not listed as a protected species...

They can hold their own against sharks with knives in outer space, they don't need our protection!  ;-)

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2008 – The Detroit Lions crash in a 31-21 loss to Green Bay Packers at Lambeau Field; first team in NFL history to go winless in a 16-game season.  Of all the records the Lions could have set, it had to be THIS one.

My high school's basketball team had a record-long losing streak at one point.  They have a "sub-freshman" class which combines seventh and eighth grades into one year, so almost everyone is a year younger than the same grade at other high schools, meaning the guys were all a year shorter.  In high school basketball, apparently that makes a difference.  The school doesn't even *have* a football team.

Perhaps equally important, perhaps moreso, it's a nerd school, so athleticism isn't exactly sought out or nurtured.  Our chess and math teams, on the other hand, always kick ass!

[Illjwamh 98]

On Dec. 30 in History:

999 - The forces of Munster and Meath under King Brian Boru defeat the forces of Leinster and Dublin at the Battle of Glenmama during the Leinster revolt. If you're wondering how the revolt ends, know that this was the only battle fought in it.

1066 - The Jewish vizier is crucified and most of the Jewish population of Granada are killed by a Muslim mob. Poor Jews just cannot catch a break.

1460 - Richard, Duke of York is killed by Lancastrians at the Battle of Wakefield during the Wars of the Roses. His claim to the throne dies with him; I mean, it's not like he has a son or anyth- oh, god dammit.

1816 = A Treaty of St. Louis is proclaimed, in which the Ojibwa, Ottawa, and Potawatomi cede lands to the U.S. in exchange for some stuff. The type of stuff is not specified.

1825 - Another Treat of St. Louis is proclaimed, in which the Shawnee cede lands to the U.S. in exchange for $11,000 and a five year lease on a blacksmith shop. Also they'll be best friends now.

1853 - U.S. ambassador to Mexico James Gadsden signs a deal for a spit of land along the border. Ostensibly this is to facilitate railroad construction, but the real reason is so that maps of the continental U.S. don't look like a mouse has been chewing on them.

1869 - Humorist Stephen Leacock, one of the most prominent Canadians of all time, is born. I'm including this because he had a house in Orillia, where my family is from. It's all about ME!

1896 - Ernie McLea scores the first to score a hat-trick in Stanley Cup play, leading the Montréal Victorias to...ah, victory over the Winnipeg Victorias. The latter team is presumably required to change their name.

1916 - Rasputin is shot three times and dies. His body is thrown in a river. Everything else about his assassination is unsubstantiated urban legend, but it sure is more exciting

1922 - The soviet states of Russia, Transcaucasia, Ukraine, and Byelorussia form a new club.

1928 - Bo Diddley is born. I don't know for a fact that his first cries are in the form of his famous beat, but I choose to believe it is true.

1947 - Michael I, the last king of Romania, is forced to abdicate by communists supported by the club mentioned above. Given this, is his regnal number really necessary?

1958 - The Guatemalan Air Force sinks some Mexican fishing boats over a border dispute, because apparently they have nothing better to do.

2006 - Saddam Hussein is executed. That ought to put an end to all the violence in the region.

[Illjwamh 98]

On Dec. 31 in History:

192 - Emperor Commodus is killed, not by Russel Crowe in a gladiatorial arena, but by being strangled to death in a bath. Makes for less engaging cinema.

1225 - 7 year old Lý Chiêu Hoàng, the only reigning empress in Vietnam's history, ends her family's 216 year dynasty and abdicates in favor of her 7 year old husband Trần Thái Tông. Because having a child ruler is one thing, but a child ruler without a penis? Ridiculous!

1660 - Louis XIV of France sees nothing wrong with naming James, an heir to the English throne, as Duke of Normandy. There are zero precedents indicating this might be a bad idea.

1759 - Arthur Guinness signs a lease for land in Dublin to start making his beer. At £45 a year, it may seem a bit pricey now, but when you factor in that the lease is for 9,000 years, it may end up being worth the investment.

1857 - Queen Victoria chooses the small logging town of Ottawa as the capital of Canada, presumably by throwing darts at a map while drunk.

1862 - West Virginia successfully secedes from Virginia and becomes a state in its own right. Most people are too busy killing each other to appreciate the irony, which is a shame, as it's very amusing.

1879 - Thomas Edison demonstrates his incandescent light bulb for the first time in New Jersey. Cartoon characters around the country suddenly start getting ideas.

1907 - The first annual transformation of Times Square into a toilet for thousands of people is held.

1943 - John Denver is born several thousand miles from West Virginia.

1992 - Czechoslovakia decides its name is too long and splits in half. There may have been other factors involved.

1993 - Brandon Teena is murdered for having the gall to report his transphobic rapists, but that's not funny at all so I'm not going to put it on here. Wait....shit.

1994 - This day does not exist in Kiribati, due to shifting time zones 24 hours ahead. The I-Kiribati are disappointed to learn that they did not actually travel into the future.

1999 - Russian president Boris Yeltsin resigns, leaving Prime Minister Vladimir Putin in charge. Excellent, the mechanisms of democracy appear to be running smoothly.

1999 again - Panama attains control of the Panama Canal for the first time in history. Thought is given to changing the name, but they ultimately decide to stick with what everyone already knows.

[Pharaoh RutinTutin 1,586]

Sufferin' Succotash
Not even a mention that New Year's Eve is St Sylvester's Day?

[Illjwamh 98]

Every day is Saint Somebody's Day.

 

On Jan. 1 in history:

45 BCE - The Julian calendar takes effect, meaning that for the first time, this is officially the beginning of a new year.

42 BCE - Julius Caesar is posthumously deified. I'm sure he appreciates it.

69 - A bunch of Roman soldiers decide they don't want Galba to be emperor and declare for Vitellius instead. It won't end well for either of them.

193 - In a bizarre twist, this time it is the new emperor himself, Pertinax, who doesn't want to be emperor. Can't imagine why.

414 - The emperor's half-sister, Galla Placidia, marries the king of the Visigoths in a lavish and elaborate royal wedding. The 24 hour news cycle laments that it does not yet exist.

417 - The emperor's half-sister, Galla Placidia, marries one of Rome's top generals, who...wait, what?

1259 - Michael VIII is proclaimed co-emperor of the ERE along with John IV. If you read the Christmas entry, you know they'll get along swimmingly.

1515 - Francis I of France becomes king of France. I'm only putting it on here because I'm amazed it took roughly 1,000 years for this to happen.

1600 - Scotland decides that March 25 is a dumb day to start the new year.

1735 - Paul Revere is born, which means that even though several other notable people were born on this date as well, I won't be mentioning any of them.

1801 - Great Britain and Ireland unite to become the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland. They remain best buds forever.

1808 - The importation of slavery is banned in the United States. It seriously took this long for them to do that. Bear in mind that you can still own slaves, and you can still "breed" slaves, you just can't bring any new ones into the country. Because that would be barbaric.

1863 - Abraham Lincoln frees all slaves in the lands he does not control, and none of them in the lands he does.

1908 - The first Times Square ball drop is held. Dick Clark hosts.

1959 - Cuban dictator Fulgencio Batista is overthrown by a plucky band of rebels led by a chap named Fidel Castro.

1962 - Western Samoa attains independence from...New Zealand? Wow, really?

1983 - ARPANET switches to the Internet Protocol, creating the Internet and fulfilling Al Gore's glorious vision.

1984 - AT&T is broken up. 22 Bell companies emerge in what is spectacular foreshadowing for that one scene in Terminator 2 when the frozen T-1000 gets shot and shattered in the steel mill. You know the one I'm talking about.

1999 - The Euro currency is introduced, to the delight of coin collectors everywhere.

[Illjwamh 98]

On January 2 in history:

533 - The new Pope, Mercurius, changes his name to John (the first Pope to do such a thing), since he doesn't think it's fitting for a Pope to be named for a pagan god. Too bad nobody ever told Zephyrinus or Dionysius. Damn, it's totally his fault we don't have cool Pope names anymore isn't it?

1492 - Spaniards to the Moors of Granada (and in general): GTFO!

1777 - The British try to come back into Trenton, but George Washington kicks their pink asses at Assunpink Creek. I'm twelve.

1833 - Two British naval vessels arrive at the Falkland Islands with the message, "I don't know what you lot think you're doing over there, but these are still ours, thank you very much."

1920 - Isaac Asimov is born. To robots, probably.

1967 - Hollywood actor Ronald Reagan is elected governor of California in what all agree is American political culture's peak level of ridiculousness.

1980 - President Jimmy Carter, feeling quite salty, lets the Russian government know in no uncertain terms that military intervention in Afghanistan is not acceptable. It is a position the U.S. government will continue to hold until they want to do it.

[Don Edwards 548]

1943 - John Denver is born several thousand miles from West Virginia.

Roswell, N.M.

Boy does THAT explain a lot!