Pharaoh RutinTutin

https://www.patreon.com/posts/22235024 http://egscomics.com/sketchbook/2018-032 If this transformation was temporary and intended as "punishment", the long term effect would be not unlike Jerry's hammers. It could actually encourage more bad behavior. As for who did the transforming? I know it is easy to blame Kitty. But there are just too many ways this kind of change could happen in Moperville. Even though extremely unlikely, this kind of change is possible even within the realm of random quantum fluctuation in our own "reality"*. * I am still not convinced that our reality is actually real

23 October First, if you happen to be reading this between 06:02 AM and 06:02 PM local time on October 23, HAPPY MOLE DAY! (6.02 x 1023) 42 BC – Liberators' civil war: Second Battle of Philippi: Mark Antony and Octavian decisively defeat Brutus's army. Brutus (the one who ate two) commits suicide. Mark Antony and Octavian would, after this point, find working together increasingly difficult. 425 – Valentinian III is elevated as Roman emperor at the age of six. The empire is falling apart, so what better way to preserve it than by crowning a child? 1157 – The Battle of Grathe Heath ends the civil war in Denmark. In 1146 Eric III had abdicated and two, eventually three, men had been declared King in different parts of Denmark. Fast forward through a decade of Viking Politics and King Sweyn III is killed with an axe by peasants after losing his own armor and weapons following the Grathe Heath battle. Valdemar I restores the country. 1295 – The first treaty forming the Auld Alliance between Scotland and France against England is signed in Paris. We know the French and Scots both have a strong dislike for the English. But is that really enough common ground to form an alliance? 1707 – The first Parliament of Great Britain meets. Even though the people of Scotland may not like the English any more now than they did then, this pretty much ends the Auld Scottish alliance with France. 1739 – War of Jenkins' Ear starts: British Prime Minister Robert Walpole, reluctantly declares war on Spain. DID YOU HEAR THAT, JENKINS? ENGLAND IS GOING TO WAR WITH SPAIN! 1812 – Claude François de Malet, a French general, begins a conspiracy to overthrow Napoleon Bonaparte, claiming that the Emperor died in Russia and that he is now the commandant of Paris. Would Monsieur de Malet prefer a firing squad or the Guillotine? 1861 – U.S. President Abraham Lincoln suspends the writ of habeas corpus in Washington, D.C., for all military-related cases. Yes, there is a war going on. But please Abe, granting and preserving some freedoms is not justification for stamping out others. 1941 – World War II: Field Marshal Georgy Zhukov takes command of Red Army operations to prevent the further advance into Russia of German forces and to prevent the Wehrmacht from capturing Moscow. To be blunt, the Soviets finally found a competent commander who had not been purged by Stalin on the eve of war with Germany. 1942 – World War II: Second Battle of El Alamein: At El Alamein, an obscure city in northern Egypt that had previously been the site of yet another inconclusive battle in the desert campaign, the British Eighth Army under Field Marshal Montgomery begins a critical offensive to expel the Axis armies from Egypt. This would mark the turning point for the Western Allies in the war against Germany or, as Winston Churchill would describe it, the end of the beginning. Herr Schicklgruber, one problem with quickly conquering very large areas is that it allows your enemies to test their weapons and practice their tactics against your forces where they are spread most thin. 1946 – The United Nations General Assembly convenes for the first time, in Flushing, Queens, New York City. Really UN? Most English speakers don't think of "Flushing" as a Long Island neighborhood. 1973 – The Watergate scandal: US President Richard M. Nixon agrees to turn over subpoenaed audio tapes of his Oval Office conversations. Was that really so hard, Mr President? The Courts and Congress are certain to be reasonable in how they proceed as long as you cooperate and don't tamper with the... Oh no.

Which brings us back to the Nanaseslas idea In her mistress' steps she trod Where the snow lay dinted Heat was in the very sod Which Nanase had printed...

Maybe Nanase is related to Good King Wenceslas? Queen Nanaseslas looked out... Or is this just one more reminder that Nanase is Hot?

22 October 362 – The temple of Apollo at Daphne, outside Antioch, is destroyed in a mysterious fire. Destroyed "mysteriously" near Antioch? Book of Armaments, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20: Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy."... 451 – The Council of Chalcedon adopts the Chalcedonian Creed regarding the divine and human nature of Jesus Christ. Yes, Jesus is God. Yes, except for the sin, Jesus is Human. What is so hard to understand? 1730 – Construction of the Ladoga Canal is completed. You'll always know your neighbour And you'll always know your pal If ya ever navigated on Ladoga Canal 1790 – Warriors of the Miami people under Chief Little Turtle defeat United States troops under General Josiah Harmar at the site of present-day Fort Wayne, Indiana, in the Northwest Indian War. Today, people from Fort Wayne invade Miami. 1797 – André-Jacques Garnerin makes the first recorded parachute jump from one thousand meters above Paris. Parking is a problem in most cities today. But is parking your transportation a kilometer above the city and then parachuting down really a viable solution? 1844 – The Great Anticipation: Millerites, followers of William Miller, anticipate the end of the world in conjunction with the Second Advent of Christ. The following day became known as the Great Disappointment. Remember folks, every prediction about the "end of the world" has, so far, been wrong. 1883 – The Metropolitan Opera House in New York City opens with a performance of Gounod's Faust. What kind of diabolical deal was made to get this place open? 1910 – Dr. Crippen is convicted at the Old Bailey of poisoning his second wife and is subsequently hanged at Pentonville Prison in London. As he was born and began his career near my home town, I am obliged to discuss him. You've probably never heard of Hawley Harvey Crippen unless you are a fan of tawdry soap-opera stories of sex and murder. He is notable as the first criminal suspect apprehended through the use of wireless telegraphy. 1964 – Jean-Paul Sartre is awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature, but turns down the honor. Existentialism taken to a ridiculous extreme? 1964 – Canada: A Multi-Party Parliamentary Committee selects the design which becomes the new official flag of Canada. As far as art designed by committee goes, it isn't so bad. 1976 – Red Dye No. 4 is banned by the US Food and Drug Administration after it is discovered that it causes tumors in the bladders of dogs. So we can ban substances that cause tumors in dog bladders. But we can't ban substances that cause tumors in human lungs? 1978 – Papal inauguration of Pope John Paul II. Second time they tried this ceremony this year. I think they got it right this time. 1998 – October 22 was designated International Stuttering Awareness Day (ISAD). The day is intended to raise public awareness of the millions of people – one percent of the world's population – who have the speech disorder of stuttering. I for one am acutely aware of stuttering. Suffice to say that there is a reason why I prefer text-based communications. 1999 – Maurice Papon, an official in the Vichy France government during World War II, is jailed for crimes against humanity. He was released for "Humanitarian" reasons after a few years while people he unjustly prosecuted were still incarcerated. For more details, see 10/17/1961.

21 October 1520 – Ferdinand Magellan discovers a strait now known as Strait of Magellan. A narrow body of water connecting two larger bodies of water in a relatively straight line named for the commander of the vessel that "discovers" it? Sounds much too simple. What did the locals call it before Magellan got there? Oh, that's right. If you don't have guns and Church backing, your opinions don't count. Same date a little farther north... 1520 – João Álvares Fagundes discovers the islands of Saint Pierre and Miquelon, bestowing them their original name of "Islands of the 11,000 Virgins". The French Overseas Collectivity can barely support a population of less than 7,000 today. How did eleven thousand virgins, and who knows how many not-so-virgins, manage to survive off the Newfoundland coast back then? 1797 – In Boston Harbor, Old Ironsides (Not Raymond Burr) the 44-gun United States Navy frigate USS Constitution is launched. She's still afloat and ready to defend Boston Harbor against any brig, sloop, or schooner the British might send to retaliate for that tea incident. 1805 – Napoleonic Wars: Battle of Trafalgar: A British fleet led by Vice Admiral Lord Nelson defeats a combined French and Spanish fleet under Admiral Villeneuve. The Brits are going to remember this one for a while. 1824 – Joseph Aspdin patents Portland cement. Water proof mortar is fine for those who can't be bothered to shape and fit stones with surgical precision. 1845 – Birth of Will Carleton, American poet and journalist (d. 1912). If you're not from Michigan, you've probably never heard of him. But as he lived and worked near my hometown, I am obliged to comment on him at every opportunity. http://www.poorhousestory.com/over_the_hill.htm 1854 – Florence Nightingale and a staff of 38 nurses are sent to the Crimean War. Why Britain and France were involved in a war between Russia and the Ottoman Empire is difficult for historians to explain. What Florence Nightingale did for Nursing and Medicine must not be forgotten. Nightingale was trained as a statistician. I don't know how, but the medical profession's dependence on paperwork seems to begin here. 1867 – The Medicine Lodge Treaty is signed by southern Great Plains Indian leaders. The treaty requires Native American Plains tribes to relocate to a reservation in western Oklahoma. What medicine was in that lodge that made the Native leaders think the US Government would honor this treaty? 1879 – Thomas Edison applies for a patent for his design for an incandescent light bulb. What a brilliant idea 1895 – The Republic of Formosa collapses as Japanese forces invade. When Japan managed to capture some islands near Taiwan without much effort, the Qing Dynasty decided that giving Japan Taiwan would be in their best interest. The people on Taiwan didn't agree, and declared their independence. This independence lasted until the Japanese fleet arrived and, with Qing forces already gone, took over. 1910 – HMS Niobe arrives in Halifax Harbour to become the first ship of the Royal Canadian Navy. Canada, you have a LOT of coastline. You really should have been taking steps on your own before this. 1921 – President Warren G. Harding delivers the first speech by a sitting U.S. President against lynching in the deep South. So Americans as a people are not officially sure something is wrong until the President tells us it is wrong? 1945 – Women's suffrage: Women are allowed to vote in France for the first time. Are you sure it's still not too soon? Maybe you want to wait until after the next war. 1973 – Fred Dryer of the Los Angeles Rams becomes the first player in NFL history to score two safeties in the same game. For those unfamiliar with American Gridiron Football, a Safety is scored when a team downs the ball in their own end zone, giving two points (or in very rare cases, one point) and control of the ball to the other team. It's often as embarrassing as an Own Goal in that other kind of Football. 1983 – The metre is defined at the seventeenth General Conference on Weights and Measures as the distance light travels in a vacuum in 1/299,792,458 of a second. So if you are ever measuring something and you don't have a meter stick, just get out your stopwatch that can track time to at least one part in three hundred millionths of a second.

19 October 202 BC – Second Punic War: At the Battle of Zama, Roman legions under Scipio Africanus defeat Hannibal Barca, leader of the army defending Carthage. This sounds very impressive... 439 – The Vandals, led by King Gaiseric, take Carthage in North Africa. Wait a minuet. Carthage fell to Vandalism? I am much less impressed with General Scipio. 1216 – King John of England, yes the King John who was the younger brother of Richard the Lionheart. The King who committed the unforgivable sin of not being Richard the Lionheart. The King who suffered countless insults with every retelling of the Robin Hood legend. The King began the long British tradition of surrendering Royal power to the minor nobles by signing the Magna Carta (not the Japanese comic version of the Manga Carta). The King who was the youngest of five sons of King Henry II of England and Duchess Eleanor of Aquitaine. The King who proved unable to hold his mother's territories in France. This King dies at Newark-on-Trent and is succeeded by his nine-year-old son Henry III. It would be several more Henrys before England found a king more notorious than John. 1453 – The Hundred Years' War ends with the French recapture of Bordeaux, leaving English control only on Calais. Maybe there is some place other than France England could try conquering? 1469 – Ferdinand II of Aragon marries Isabella I of Castile, a marriage that paves the way to the unification of Aragon and Castile into a single country, Spain. It also permits Ricky Ricardo to frequently exclaim "Lucy! You got some Spaining to do!" 1781 – At Yorktown, Virginia, representatives of British commander Lord Cornwallis hand over Cornwallis' sword and formally surrender to George Washington and the comte de Rochambeau. Why were the British fighting so hard to keep these troublesome colonies in the first place? 1805 – Napoleonic Wars: Austrian General Mack surrenders his army to the Grande Armée of Napoleon Bonaparte at the Battle of Ulm; 30,000 prisoners are captured and 10,000 casualties inflicted on the losers. Careful Monsieur Bonaparte. Not every battle will go so well for the Grande Armée. 1812 – Napoleon Bonaparte retreats from Moscow. Tough loss, but a great musical score. 1813 – The Battle of Leipzig concludes, giving Napoleon Bonaparte one of his worst defeats. Maybe there is some place other than Europe France could try conquering? 1933 – Germany withdraws from the League of Nations. But how does Germany expect to peacefully resolve its diplomatic issues without league backing? 1973 – President Richard Nixon rejects an Appeals Court decision that he turn over the Watergate tapes. He's sure to rethink this position and release all the tapes, complete and unedited.

Many adventuring archeologists seem to believe that anything you find by digging it up is yours to keep. Some other people have crazy ideas like that the stuff in tombs still belongs to the deceased, or their family, or the religion that buried the guy and his stuff, or the country in which the tomb is found...

http://egscomics.com/egsnp/nanasecraft-02 It is easier to be caviler about money if you either have a lot of it, or none whatsoever. And if you have none whatsoever, you going to be caviler about money pretty close to home. Not in some exotic adventure locale.

With as much awkwardness as is often experienced in EGS, I think it is Diane who has finally had this "Weird Al' moment https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8tRDv9fZ_c

Revenge is a dish best served cold. The main story is only now approaching the coldest part of the first winter since that incident.

NO! I don't care what your educational credentials may imply. I don't care if you lived through the relevant Historical period. I Don't care how CUTE you may look. I will reject any attempt to deny the reality of the Viking Horned Helmet. Longenhodden, according to Rose Nylund.

I knew yawl would point that out schooner or later.

13 October AD 54 – Emperor Claudius dies from poisoning under mysterious circumstances, supposedly after eating mushrooms. One legend claims his final words were "Damn it! I can feel myself becoming a god." His 17-year-old stepson Nero succeeds him. Strangely enough, the "Poisoning" may have been a purely accidental case of food poisoning, or even some other natural causes. While there isn't usually too much nice to say about Nero, it doesn't look like he was directly involved with the death of Claudius. Nero's mother, Agrippina the Younger, on the other hand... 1307 – Hundreds of Knights Templar in France are simultaneously arrested by agents of Phillip the Fair, to be later tortured into a "confession" of heresy. To be fair to Philip, "Fair" has several meanings. It would be unfair to say that Philip received "the Fair" as an epithet for his behavior towards the Templars, or the Jews, or the English, or the Papal Court... 1773 – The Whirlpool Galaxy is discovered by Charles Messier. This is the Galaxy now known as M51a. Not a washing machine. 1884 – The International Meridian Conference, in Washington, votes on a resolution to establish the meridian passing through the Observatory of Greenwich, in London, as the initial meridian for longitude. Most of Europe and the Americas would have their clocks synchronized with Britain, ± n hours, within a decade. Most. France would take their time, keeping their own time for some time. 1903 – The Boston Red Sox win the first modern World Series, defeating the Pittsburgh Pirates in the eighth game. For a World Championship, teams from outside the United States have won it only twice. 1923 – Ankara replaces Istanbul as the capital of Turkey. If the capital is not Constantinople, it might as well be Ankara. Even though they didn't include that town in the song. 1983 – Ameritech Mobile Communications launched the first US cellular network in Chicago. Finally, we can drive around the city and never need to put down our phones. 2010 – The mining accident in Copiapó, Chile comes to an end as all 33 miners arrive at the surface after surviving a record 69 days underground awaiting rescue. While this was a compelling story with a happy ending, an even better result would have occurred if the mine had been run with safety standards in the first place.

If he's talking about ships, shouldn't the line from the last panel be "I've sailed yawl"?